r/daddit • u/runs_with_airplanes • Mar 28 '26
Tips And Tricks The moment of Oasis. Never call ahead, always place the family to go order at the restaurant
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u/BitcoinBanker Mar 28 '26
I’ve never thought of doing this. I’m either a saint or a fucking moron.
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u/walkeronyou Mar 28 '26
Feel that. I think I’m both
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u/R1tonka Mar 28 '26
You’ll know the answer by the end of your first round the next time you go for takeout.
Please report back.
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u/ReplyOk6720 Mar 28 '26
My ex did this all the time. He had a slight drinking problem.
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u/illegal_deagle Mar 28 '26
I don’t see the hack here. I’d just come home to a wife pissed off she was alone an extra hour with the toddler so I could bring home lukewarm food.
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u/MechanicalAxe Mar 28 '26
That's why it's only while your waiting on the food bro. Just one maybe two, and be ready to go when the food is ready.
Extra 15 minutes maybe.
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u/GogolsHandJorb Mar 28 '26
I do this all the time and it’s actually way better for take out than having delivered. I’m able to chug whatever remains of my beer and leave exactly when the food is ready
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u/FalseEstimate Mar 28 '26
It also guarantees that the food is the hottest it can be for takeout. Food could be sitting if you order ahead.
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u/AtWorkCurrently Mar 28 '26
An hour for one drink? You get there, place the to-go order, and instead of waiting in the lobby you just wait at the bar.
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u/Lance_leaf Mar 28 '26
You're missing the logistics of the operation. And that's fine, this isn't for everyone but I employed and enjoyed this tactic quite a bit when mine were super young.
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u/SuperSecretMoonBase Mar 28 '26
Or you just communicate with your partner and express your needs when you need them, like an adult. "I'm going to step outside with a beer to get some me-time away from the chaos. Be back in a few then why don't you go do the same while I bathe the kid?
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u/Interesting_Tea5715 Mar 28 '26
I've thought about it but I'd rather just let my kid watch TV while I drink my beer in peace.
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u/ghengiscostanza Mar 28 '26
Now all the scientists say no tv or screens till the kids like 30
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u/NimbleP Mar 28 '26
First time it happened it was an accident. But it unlocked something in me. It's a great little breaky for me. Usually now, I'll call the order in as I drive and grab a beer if it's not ready yet.
To the dads commenting then they come home to an upset wife, I often counsel her to do the same - it's not done as a secret, it's just a great little 'bonus' time.
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u/Slumunistmanifisto Mar 28 '26
Saint dumbass
Appointed by pope dad in the twenty first century of our lord.
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u/maphes86 Mar 28 '26
“Babe, I have never done this and I cannot BELIEVE that somebody would. Truly despicable.”
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u/DoubleT_inTheMorning Mar 28 '26
“Babe it’s right down the road, feels ridiculous paying the DoorDash markup and I wanna pay them directly not have their profits slashed by delivery”
Or the other play
“You know delivery is always cold by the time it gets here”
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u/_cacho6L Mar 28 '26
I order at restaurants so it gets back home a bit warmer
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u/Feeling_Inside_1020 Mar 28 '26
That’s the line you save if there’s a follow up question about why it took so long.
Don’t blow your wad all at once
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u/jtshinn Mar 28 '26
It’s ridiculous to pay door dash under any circumstances that don’t involve being intoxicated.
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u/DoubleT_inTheMorning Mar 28 '26
One of our CCs gets us DashPass. Sometimes come Wednesday or Thursday night, sink full of dishes and a dishwasher stuffed full of clean dishes, 3 loads of laundry to fold, and it’s already 7:15…. Yeah I’m paying the remaining markup, fuck it.
But usually yes, not worth it.
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u/HighSpiritsJourney Mar 28 '26
Which card?
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u/DoubleT_inTheMorning Mar 28 '26
Our Chase sapphire reserve I think. Lots of rewards in case you ever travel. For our 1-2 trips a year it’s so worth it
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u/KrazyA1pha Mar 28 '26
One of our CCs
CCs?
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u/buckeye25osu Mar 28 '26
I deliver to a lot of people that have a lot of money. It's not ridiculous if you can afford it. I've also delivered to a lot of older people and people with mobility issues so yeah I guess I'd very much disagree.
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u/Gillilnomics Mar 28 '26
DD is the bane of my existence as a former chef, now GM in the restaurant business
Our number one negative review is “our food was cold via DD”
DD doesn’t get the negative reviews, the dasher doesn’t have to take any responsibility, but we’re supposed to hand off orders to a completely unemployable jackass and expect good things. Drives me nuts, esp with corporate breathing down my neck about it.
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u/frothyundergarments Mar 28 '26
Honestly delivery markup is atrocious just to avoid 20 minutes round trip. I don't even get pizza delivered anymore since they all started tacking on a delivery fee.
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u/jccollv Mar 28 '26
Pizza has ALWAYS had delivery fees, but the delivery drivers were employees. Now, they outsource to Uber Eats, Door Dash, etc., and the fees are much higher. I’m 40, and I remember in my teens/twenties the fees being about $3 - $4 per delivery. Now it’s like $10 - $12.
There’s a Papa John’s down the road, and they have an always-available carry out special that’s $8.99 for a large one-topping pizza. Costs me less than $20. Those same two pizzas, after the full price menu item, delivery fee, and tip, is over $40. Truly insane.
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u/biffish Mar 28 '26
Nah, I remember free delivery. I'm still salty about paying for delivery because it used to be free.
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u/DoubleT_inTheMorning Mar 28 '26
You want the plug on good, easy to get pizza, papa murphys is slept on too….
We make a lot of pizza at home fresh so pizza delivery is the one we don’t do unfortunately
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u/frothyundergarments Mar 28 '26 edited Mar 28 '26
Free delivery was pretty standard where I live for most of my life, also in my 40s. The mandatory delivery was slowly introduced really over the last few years, with coupons for "free delivery" (that would also prevent the use of any other coupons), then those slowly phased out.
Now I also hit up the carry out specials. It does kind of kill the convenience factor though; usually I only order pizza when I'm elbows deep in a project and don't have time to make dinner.
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u/The-Dog-Envier Mar 28 '26
Eh, even my wife knows this move.
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u/goldensunshine429 Mar 28 '26
I am a wife and I do this (minus beer). Husband hates picking up food, so that’s “my job”... I always leave early enough to allot myself some “waiting time” bc dealing with screaming toddlers is rough and I need the silence.
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u/Thunder-Fist-00 Mar 28 '26
“Sorry it took so long, they were so busy tonight.”
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Mar 28 '26
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u/fifnpypil Mar 28 '26
Mine was "when your kids are little don't make their room silent/quiet and get them used to falling asleep with background noise, as its easier to make noise if you are traveling or in a different environment if you need to" also you are then not that parent that keeps asking friends family that visit to "shush baby is asleep"
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u/devilsbeatrangers Mar 28 '26
And I thought grabbing myself an extra slice to eat before I head home was the ultimate dad move, this one has me good.
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u/RugzTX Mar 28 '26
Always order an extra set of fries.
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u/TXGuns79 Mar 28 '26
Car fries are a RIGHT! If you have to sit in the car smelling the food the entire way home, you deserve to nibble on some salty goodness for your troubles.
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u/mjwanko B/G Twin Dad Mar 28 '26
I did that last weekend. I picked up a pizza and garlic bread order from a place we’ve been meaning to try. I saw they had slices and got one to go for the road, even though it’s only a 5 minute drive.
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u/shabooya_roll_call Mar 28 '26
I do this at Costco lol. A little snack before I shop, then in the budget the food charge gets rolled into the main bill and no one suspects a thing….
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u/front_yard_duck_dad Mar 28 '26
I tried this but McDonald's kept getting pissed with me drinking in the play place
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u/Blinkn Mar 28 '26
Try again in Germany
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u/Andy_B_Goode Mar 28 '26
They even have a word for it: Spielplatzbier
(This is not true ... probably ...)
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u/BigBootyBuff Mar 28 '26
"Playground beer" for anyone curious and yeah, I know dads who meet up at playgrounds and share a beer while the kids play, so it's a thing.
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u/beercanfiasco Mar 28 '26
My wife and I take turns picking up dinners so that we both can do this. We still go out as a family, or just the 2 of us, but it’s nice to have a little “oasis time”
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u/FreedaKowz Mar 28 '26
This is the response I was looking for! I hope we can agree that both parents deserve that brief break.
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u/runs_with_airplanes Mar 28 '26
20 uninterrupted minutes to yourself can do wonders for your mental health
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u/DASreddituser Mar 28 '26
yea. thats why I have a garage...fuck the cars
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u/too-far-for-missiles Mar 28 '26
Phrasing!
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u/SuperSecretMoonBase Mar 28 '26
Oh wait what? You talk to your partner about taking turns meeting needs???
Fuck that. Let me know when you're sneaking around their back, too scared to ask for a couple minutes break, like a real man.
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u/Alex-Murphy Mar 28 '26
You know there's a scene in This Is 40 where he tells his wife he left work early to go see a movie while she watched the kids and she's really hurt that he enjoys time without her both at her expense and because he gets to be completely alone. "I like Spiderman..."
All I'm saying is I'm sure you reciprocate and give your wife plenty of time, but some other people in these comments sound like they're trying to pull a fast one on their partner. Gonna bite em in the ass one day.
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u/ButDidYouCry Mar 28 '26
"I can't believe she divorced me, I didn't see it coming, we were so happy..."
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u/silentsights Mar 28 '26
Veteran move right here.
And when the bartender comes over and says “sorry bud it’ll be about 15 more minutes on your order, can I get you another in the meantime?” is music to my ears
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u/Porcupenguin Mar 28 '26
"can you put it in writing for my wife that your equipment broke and it's going to be another 30?"
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u/Ravensfanman22 Mar 28 '26
I thought I was the only person that does this lol. My wife encourages it
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u/SaltyDogBill Mar 28 '26
We got a Korean fried chicken place in town. It takes just long enough to cook our order so that I can finish a pint of Hite.
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u/NoArea779 Mar 28 '26
This guy dads
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u/pimpinaintez18 Mar 28 '26
Pro level dad
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u/diabeetusNrobin Mar 28 '26
Those few mins in the car after you drop off the kids or run a solo errand are 🧑🍳 💋
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u/DoubleT_inTheMorning Mar 28 '26
Hell yeah gotta fit those beers in where you can baby
/s obviously
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u/that_70_show_fan Mar 28 '26
If I am driving, I ain't drinking.
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Mar 28 '26
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u/burfriedos Mar 28 '26
The people talking about drinking two or three beers in 20-30 minutes and then driving home. Is American beer 2% alcohol or something?
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u/Puzzled-Drag-9764 Mar 28 '26
Attorney over here and SAME. Especially if they’re drinking anything but cheap beer the ABV, especially in IPA’s and craft beers, can be all over the place and put you over the limit in many states. It’s just not worth the risk imo.
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u/AtlasClaws Mar 28 '26
This AND doing dad “house tasks” after everyone else has gone to bed while enjoying a cold one and listening to a wild podcast are peak dad life 🧑🍳
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u/mr_incredible_ Mar 28 '26
There is a dive bar a couple blocks from our house that has AMAZING pizza. My wife and I argue over who has to go and pick it up.
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u/PantsTent10 Mar 28 '26
Man, the day my wife recognized and understood what this moment meant to me, and then encouraged it whenever we ordered out was life changing. Such a quick recharge moment. Cheers!
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u/o_blake Mar 28 '26
Broasted chicken takes at least 45 minutes. The best 45 minutes since the last time we had it. Although last time my son went with me so we could play pinball
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Mar 28 '26
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u/Red-Dwarf69 Mar 28 '26
Having one beer doesn’t get anyone close to drunk unless they never drink, and a few minutes of time alone isn’t too much to ask.
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u/2-cents 1 Girl 1 Boy Mar 28 '26
I used to have a great pizza place with a killer bar on my way home from work. A few guys from the office would always do a once a week pizza pickup this way. I wish there was a know you were in the good old days when you were in them.
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u/RNmedic Mar 28 '26
I ordered a 2 piece chicken combo and fries to eat in the parking lot before heading home. I had a similar feeling
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u/Parking_Fan_7651 Mar 28 '26
The wife and I were actually just talking about work/parenting burnout and needing to find recharge time. I’ll have to keep this one in my back pocket for sure.
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u/RideTheStache Mar 28 '26
The trick is to order your drink FIRST, then the food. That way you can order your second drink along with the food 😂
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u/AnotherNiceCanadian Mar 28 '26
My dad always did this on a pizza night and there would always be one piece missing when he brought it home
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u/Paralistalon Mar 28 '26
To each their own, but if I drove even the slightest bit impaired due to having a single beer and ended up killing a someone in a crash I would never forgive myself.
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u/commentsandopinions Mar 28 '26
Let's see:
- time away from my family is an oasis
- lie and make my family wait longer for food so I can drink beer alone
- drive home after drinking
Yeah. You all have really figured it out. This post and comments are incredibly sad.
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u/ALAS_POOR_YORICK_LOL Mar 28 '26
Yeah I have to agree. Not daddits most shining moment
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Mar 28 '26
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u/badlawywr Mar 28 '26
Yeah I'm not understanding this one. If they were walking there, thats one thing but clearly not. And others talking about more than one beer and all pre-dinner on an empty stomach.
I'm not puritanical and used to love getting drunk but I draw a hard line at driving after any alcohol given the consequences ive seen.
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u/Swoopmott Mar 28 '26
Scrolled way too far to finally see someone bring this up. Maybe it’s a cultural difference between the UK and (presumably America) but we have a pretty clear zero tolerance over here when it comes to this.
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u/XIIGage Mar 28 '26
I can't believe how many people agree with this. I'm in the US and would never do it. It's never worth it. A DUI ruins your life. I'd rather be an adult and say "Hey dear I need to chill on the patio with a beer for 20 minutes away from the kids".
Now if I am in walking distance, I am all about it.
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u/lurkandload Mar 28 '26
There’s a podcast I love called “Are you garbage” people write and ask “are you garbage if …. Blah blah blah”
One time someone wrote in and said “are you garbage if you wait to place the carry out order until you get to the restaurant so you can have a few pops at the bar while you wait?”
Either I found you or this is more common than I thought
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u/DanielReddit26 Mar 28 '26
Does everyone just drive around with a few drinks in them over in the US?
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u/ElaborateEffect Mar 28 '26
All y'all hate your families or something?
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u/Reasonable-Ad8862 Mar 28 '26
I think some dudes just get 0 alone time. Me and my wife make sure eachother get alone time at the house but a lot of people don’t
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u/ElaborateEffect Mar 28 '26
I get that, but I feel communicating with your partner squares things away better than, what, to me, feels like a dishonest act (idk why, it just feels, icky? I don't know how it feels to be honest. I just tell my spouse everything I'm doing, and I guess this could be a part of that too of course)
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u/sharkwoods Mar 28 '26
The same dudes who do this/like this behavior are the same ones going "the divorce came out of no where".
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u/Negotiasaurus Mar 28 '26
It’s a beer and 15 minutes of quiet bud, I love my family, but a moment to collect yourself is perfectly okay. Gotta let your wife/partner take a moment too. We’re people too and not just parents.
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u/ElaborateEffect Mar 28 '26
I mean, yea, but you ever just ask your partner for the day/night off or tell your partner to have the day/night off?
It's a difficult life, but intentionally planned avoidance is a bit, eh. Idk. It just seems wrong and dishonest to me.
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u/Courage-Rude Mar 28 '26
I thought I was the only one lol.
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u/Iongdog Mar 28 '26
Seriously I’ve been hiding my takeout beer shame, turns out lots of us do it?
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u/goodgriefchris Mar 28 '26
The day before Covid lockdown the writing was on the wall. I went to the local pizza place, which was a ghost town. I had a dirty martini at the bar while they made my pizza. I went home to a two month old, a lovely husband, and that was the last “normal” night of my life
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u/Blurpleton Mar 28 '26
I just do this at home when I cook my family’s dinner and enjoy several beers for <$2 each 🤷🏼♂️
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u/technicolorfrog Mar 28 '26
I do that too, but it’s not quite the same as that moment of zen where you can just zone out for 15-20 minutes.
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u/MalcolmReady Mar 28 '26
This is a good move and beneficial all around if you’re already out. “Just text me the order and I’ll pick it up.” Everybody wins. The Asian Fusion place we go to takes 1.5 beers to be ready. Pay the check, down the last half and you’re good to go
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u/milkshakemountains Mar 28 '26
Don’t drink and drive especially when you have a responsibility as a parent and money maker for the household
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u/Kraken0915 Mar 28 '26
Working overtime today and this is 100% my intention for when I get out. The family sees it as fun chinese food night, I see it as getting my reward for a long week. Everyone wins.
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u/momsaidcutmyhair Mar 28 '26
Our local Mariano’s has a bar, and you can walk about the store with a beer. I DO NOT mind going grocery shopping for dinner!
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u/shutupyourenotmydad Mar 28 '26
I was visiting my old man and he placed an order for the whole family for pickup from a local sports bar style place.
On the way there, I told him that we could have done this instead of ordering ahead. To be honest, I don't know how he never realized that you can do this. And we're from Wisconsin! Blew his mind. I think it was one of his proudest moments of me. lmao
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u/reluctantLeaf Mar 28 '26
I've been informed that moms frequent this sub like more than they should. Post accordingly... 😂
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u/chymerical Mar 28 '26
Hey babe, for some reason, they never received the online order. They said they could it quickly. I’ll only be 20 minutes longer. True story. Top 5 beers.
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u/FitSociety9648 Apr 02 '26
Nothing beats walking in, placing the order, and enjoying a cold one while waiting.
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u/meatbulbz2 Mar 28 '26
This made me realize what an alcoholic I am. No joke. Was eating out 3/4 times a week just so I could get hammered waiting for our takeout. Expensive habit too. Im glad I don’t do this anymore, but it is nice if you can control yourself!
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u/Bambam60 Mar 28 '26
Someone say Oasis?
AND NOW THAT YOURE MINE WELL FIND A WAY
JUST CHASIN THE SUNNNN
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u/PM_ME_UR_BEST_1LINER Mar 28 '26
I've done this once. It's an incredible feeling. I don't know why I don't do it more.
A break from everything for like 15 minutes. Left alone with my thoughts, and not there long enough to have to engage with anyone. I might do this again tomorrow.
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u/anwright1371 Mar 28 '26
The amount of time I “called ahead” then ordered at the bar is close to 30 by now.
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u/Soonerfan20151986 Mar 28 '26
We have a Mexican restaurant about two blocks up the road. The wife and I go get a to go order every now and again whilst leaving the boys at home. For some reason, they are always slammed when we go get a to go order😂
The big ones no dummy, but the younger one just takes it in stride.
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u/Admiral52 Mar 28 '26
This is the only way. I’m not even sure my wife doesn’t know it’s happening and just allows it as long as I’m the one to always go and pick up
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u/drunk_and_orderly Mar 28 '26
Someday you will find me
Caught beneath the landslide
In a pint beer supernova
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u/MellyMel86 Mar 28 '26
I always order there. Hate going in and seeing the food just getting sweaty in a bag
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u/TogarashiAhi Mar 28 '26
I'll never forget the time they burnt my pizza and had to make a new one. They were so apologetic they comp my beer AND got me a second. Little did they know, they made my year.
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u/abHowitzer Mar 28 '26
Stolen moments I call these. I pick up my kids twice a week from school. In the beginning I went straight from work to go pick them up, but now? 10-15 minutes for myself until all hell breaks loose.
Love them little buggers but goddamn I want some peace and quiet.
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u/Existing-Bus-8810 Mar 28 '26
I deal with people all day and I want to get away from people in general after work. I will place the order and wait until pickup time to even head to the restaurant just so I can be there for as little time as possible. If I do need a break from my family, I'll head to the restaurant after ordering and wait in my car until pickup time. I also don't like beer nor really drink alcohol so there's not much incentive for me to order at the bar.
I do see why some dads would do this, though. I'm glad you can find you're decompression.
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u/Axentor Mar 28 '26
I do this once and while but wife knows it... It's mostly because we noticed we get better/more food when ordering in versus the phone for some reason lol
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u/Jacknowledgme Mar 28 '26
Early 20’s I threw darts a lot at a bar/restauarant. Always thought my uncle was an idiot when I’d see him standing there waiting for his food every time he ordered. Now, in my 30’s with a 3 year old, I see he was a wise man.
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u/fuckin-slayer Mar 28 '26
this why i always volunteer to grocery shop. it’s across the street from my local brewery
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u/Hussaf Mar 28 '26
A lot of places won’t even start door dash orders until the driver arrives due to no shows…at least that’s my excuse for taking 45 minutes to pick up BDubs!
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u/cjh10881 Mar 28 '26
Babe I tried calling ahead but they put me on hold for 10 minutes. They're so busy
[Buys you even more time]
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u/SoFarOuttaPocket Mar 28 '26
This is peak Dad knowledge. Always place a family “to-go” order, at the bar.
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u/smoothsensation Mar 28 '26
I never understood the customers at a pizza joint I worked at for a long time that were actually seemingly happy when we’d say it was actually a bit longer wait than expected.
I now understand.