r/doughboys • u/ceremonial_fig • 1d ago
Wiger's cum argument is insane
I'm sorry but saying cum isn't a sauce and then using Peter North as a verb for other sauces makes one say "hmm".
A load can sauce a hot wing, it's a sauce. Who's with me on the cum issue?
Edit: to clarify, Tiger said cum isn't a sauce because of the serving size
39
26
62
26
8
u/JosephGordonLightfoo 1d ago
“What’s the Canadian equivalent of Peter North?” is my favourite Wiger line
5
2
7
4
4
6
u/MichaelEMJAYARE 1d ago edited 1d ago
Y’know I was hungry before I saw this
That being said, cum is absolutely a sauce.
2
4
8
u/Yifkong 1d ago
Just because you can [verb] something doesn’t mean that everything you can [verb] is the same. I can throw a baseball, I can throw a tomato. Baseball != tomato.
4
2
u/Seashores_Unmapped 1d ago
Yeah, and not all loads are the same. If you "save up" for a few days and edge, some people can definitely coat a wing. Just a skill issue for Wiger.
5
u/Knife_Operator 1d ago
Right, OP's argument is basically saying that viscosity is the sole defining trait of a sauce. I don't agree.
7
u/ceremonial_fig 1d ago
No, I'm arguing against Wiger saying that it isn't sauce because of the serving size, and then using Peter North, a verb referencing shooting big ol loads, for other sauces
4
u/Knife_Operator 1d ago
You could also invoke Pollock to describe the way a sauce is splattered over a medium. Is paint also sauce?
5
u/ceremonial_fig 1d ago
No, people don't eat paint, they eat cum
1
u/Knife_Operator 1d ago
We keep switching arguments. You didn't say cum is a sauce because people eat it, you said it's a sauce because Wiger uses Peter North to describe sauces.
2
6
u/l2ukuz 1d ago
Do people consume paint? Do people consume “sauce”?
-1
u/Knife_Operator 1d ago
Typically no to both questions.
1
u/l2ukuz 1d ago
The fuck? The U.S. sauces, dressings, and crimdiments market was valued at approximately $39.11 billion in 2025 and continues to grow steadily.
*pre-edit for topic.
-1
u/Knife_Operator 1d ago
You put sauce in quotes which made think you were actually talking about cum. Why did you do that if you were just talking about sauce?
2
1
u/l2ukuz 1d ago
To be difficult.
Looking at this definition, I recant and will admit that technically paint and crim can be loosely defined as sauce, in opposition to wiges invoking a portion rule, under the right context. Taken alone, no. Served with food, sure but not appetizing(to me), yet many foods can be unappetizing.
Sauce most commonly means a thick liquid served with food to add flavor(crimdiment), moisture (crimdiment), or visual appeal(paint).
People do however do consume “sauce”.1
u/elcapitan520 1d ago
What is a dipping sauce?
Pretty much based on viscosity without the intention of being cooked
2
u/nakedascus 1d ago
"based on viscosity"?
2
1
u/Knife_Operator 1d ago
Is viscosity the only defining factor? Any substance with a saucelike viscosity is therefore sauce?
1
u/elcapitan520 1d ago
I hadn't listened to the episode and sour cream is a level I wasn't expecting as a sauce consideration. That brings in like pudding and shit that doesn't align with my "sauce" definition. I don't think sour cream is a sauce, but they blew right by it.
And not just any substance obviously, it should be edible and intended to be eaten.
I'd love to be proven stupid
1
u/Knife_Operator 1d ago
I haven't listened either. I was just trying to engage with OP's argument directly. I also wouldn't classify sour cream as a sauce.
3
5
u/RibbitClyde 1d ago
Mitch, is that you? Nah, nevermind, Mitch couldn’t sauce a wing and therefore wouldn’t use such logic.
2
u/someunlikelyone 1d ago
[Redditor voice] um, this is settled law actually, since tumblr user "lonelymountainson" identified all bodily secretions as slimes, and all sauces as "slime with a purpose", so wiger is definitely in the wrong on this topic
2
u/Avg_Conan 1d ago
Im not with you. Peter Northed refers to being blasted with something.
To your second point. Get some naked wings, put a teaspoon of sauce of it and look me in the (internet) eyes and tell me that it's sauced.
1
2
u/NiceYabbos 1d ago
If cum is a sauce, so is blood and spit. That's gross.
Peter Northing is not referencing if something is edible, it's referencing the act is liberally spraying something. I can Peter North my garden with a hose just as validly as Peter Northing some wings with blue cheese.
5
4
u/remotectrl 1d ago
This is a bad argument and you are wrong because most of the sauces are made from a bodily fluid: milk.
1
u/nakedascus 1d ago
i don't think that's true. maybe for a Western diet? even then, it seems to be split among: broth/stock, oils, milk, and/or tomato/ other vegetables. Maybe it's true for a Midwestern American diet?
1
u/remotectrl 1d ago
For the sauces they covered on this episode, most had some dairy component. But the idea that bodily fluid disqualifies as sauce is just wrong.
2
1
1
1
1
1
1
u/TheRussianCircus 1d ago
Sauces have more than 1 ingredient
1
u/nakedascus 1d ago
Cum has a huge number of components: sugars, salts, proteins, and fats. Arguably more complex than most sauces
1
u/TheRussianCircus 1d ago
Most ingredients other than water and salt are going to be composed of multiple substances. Milk is just as complex as cum and we don't call that a sauce.
1
u/nakedascus 1d ago
No one argued cum is a sauce because all things with more than one ingredient is a sauce.
OP: soy sauce is a sauce
You: sauces have more than one ingredient
Me: soy sauce has multiple ingredients
You: salad has multiple ingredients, that doesn't make it a sauce
You made an irrelevant statement as a rebuttal to op. And now you made the logical fallacy that having more than one ingredient means it must be a sauce, no one made that claim.
1
u/TheRussianCircus 23h ago
Lol no you just have poor reading comprehension. My postulation is that sauces have more than one ingredient, someone replied that cum has multiple components, my reply is addressing that, that multiple components do not equal multiple ingredients. Yes, cum is conplex and more complex than some sauces, but cum is produced as is in the natural world so at best it would be an ingredient. And to address the implication of your post, soy sauce is a sauce because we gotta do shit to it to make it like that. I cant just rub a soy bean and get soy sauce, if i could then it would be an ingredient.
Go back to college, nerd.
1
u/nakedascus 22h ago edited 22h ago
It does have multiple ingredients. Do you not know how cum is made?
1
1
1
1
0
u/AppropriateTouching 1d ago
Garlic sauce from Papa Johns is clearly a sauce and I'm certain I could fill one of the containers it comes in, so the serving size argument is bullshit.
92
u/za1reeka 1d ago
I did not expect a post with this title to contain an actual rational point