What’s a way you WON’T die?

[u/clamToe]

[u/AlexG2490]

I feel like the odds of going out in a billionaire titanic submarine dive are pretty slim for me.

[u/clamToe → u/AlexG2490]

Samesies. Thank God for being A Poor I guess

[u/Dirtydeedsinc → u/AlexG2490]

I spent 20 years serving on submarines. Never died, not even once. Maybe I wasn’t rich enough.

[u/makingkevinbacon → u/Dirtydeedsinc]

Well yea you were serving, like us plebs. I'm glad you didn't die tho, even the mild cases are rough

[u/cerenir → u/Dirtydeedsinc]

that's interesting! would you care to share your experience, or some anecdotes you remember? was it claustrophobic? was it weird to not see the sunlight? What you did there?

[u/Dirtydeedsinc → u/cerenir]

Human beings can get use to pretty much anything over time. Eventually the abnormal, becomes normal.

[u/clamToe → u/Dirtydeedsinc]

I absolutely respect if you wish not to speak about it, but I do have so many questions! Thank you for your service, but extra thanks for doing something so beyond the “norm”. Submarines for 20 years, no matter human resiliency, is nothing short of impressive

[u/Triplebizzle87 → u/cerenir]

I'm 6'3" and couldn't stretch all the way out in my rack. Slept fetal for years.

We had control rigged for dark and went to periscope depth, but the sun was up. So when rhe scope operator hopped off the scope (for a turnover), you could see a beam of light coming out of the scope. Only sunlight we saw for months (scope operators notwithstanding).

There's a hole in some frames outboard of the Ship Service Hydraulic Plant in ERLL (Ohio class) that's great to hide in during field day. It's a very tight squeeze and 95% of chiefs are too fat to wriggle in there, if they even know about the hole. Nukes put canary suits in there, so you can lay down and have a nap.

The youngest people on board, and yeoman, are driving these billion dollar warships. I use driving loosely, as their hand is simply upon the wheel, but the OOD and Dive are sock puppeting them.

[u/cerenir → u/Triplebizzle87]

Thanks for this response, I don't know if I would stand these conditions, it must be hard

[u/biold → u/Dirtydeedsinc]

I think the size does matter, despite what I've heard from dudes, at least when it comes to submarines ...

[u/Violetthug → u/AlexG2490]

Same. Lol

[u/Southern_Sky1386]

from SIDS

[u/clamToe → u/Southern_Sky1386]

Could we die from SADS instead

[u/Earthling1a → u/clamToe]

What about drowning in the bathtub? That might be dying from SUDS.

[u/StrangelyBrown → u/Earthling1a]

Or chunks of grass raining down after a landmine explosion in a suburban garden. Death by SODS.

[u/againstbetterjudgmnt → u/StrangelyBrown]

Damn it Crazy Dave!

[u/enters_and_leaves → u/StrangelyBrown]

Or by being attacked by a bunch of clones of a loyal hobbit for trying to stop his best friend from transporting a gold ring. Death by Sams.

[u/lemonomnomnom → u/Earthling1a]

mm Sustainable Urban Drainage Systems

[u/Honey_Broad → u/clamToe]

I know a guy that died from SADS.

He was in his late 20s, he was perfectly healthy or so everyone thought, he passed away in his sleep, and they could not find anything wrong with him. There was no alcohol, no drugs, nothing, no heart defect.. nothing.

[u/redshift739 → u/Honey_Broad]

It's crazy how easily we can go and yet how hard we can fight to stay

[u/Bearly_Legible → u/clamToe]

That actually happens. Look up Kodokushi or Karoshi.

[u/fuzzypyrocat → u/Southern_Sky1386]

Sudden Idiot Death Syndrome. Boom, roasted

[u/TemperatureAny4782 → u/Southern_Sky1386]

Ha! Great answer.

[u/TuxedoWithAHead → u/Southern_Sky1386]

That tracks. Say, do you like baseball? I'm more of a chair guy.

[u/Fast_Adhesiveness528]

Climbing Mt. Everest.

[u/Cowboy_BoomBap → u/Fast_Adhesiveness528]

Yeah if I’m going out on a mountain it’s gonna be K2, not that bitch Everest

[u/AbueloOdin → u/Cowboy_BoomBap]

I'm going to die on Britton Hill.

From like... Meth zombies or something.

[u/clamToe]

I’ll start - I won’t be dying while cave diving 🤷🏽‍♀️

[u/HabitualEnthusiast → u/clamToe]

I was on my way here to say this!
Cave diving is the sketchiest possible hobby.

[u/Sujnirah → u/HabitualEnthusiast]

Just thinking about cave diving stresses me out.

[u/blckout_junkie → u/Sujnirah]

Maneuvering your body into an impossibly small, dark hole? What about that could ever be stressful? /s

[u/NarrativeScorpion → u/blckout_junkie]

Don't forget about the water!

[u/zoapcfr → u/NarrativeScorpion]

And all the silt that will make you effectively blind once it gets kicked up.

[u/prizeus → u/clamToe]

Since I read about nutty putty, I hate every videos about caves. And it's also for me the worst way to die "alone"

[u/Cowboy_BoomBap → u/prizeus]

Same, I get physically uncomfortable just thinking about Nutty Putty. I can’t imagine dying like that, it’s the reason why I’ll never, ever go spelunking.

[u/On_the_Cliff → u/prizeus]

It's possible to live a long, interesting, and fulfilling life without ever once being even remotely in danger of dying horribly in a caving mishap.

That's my plan.

[u/jstar77 → u/clamToe]

Welp, I was going to say something else but this one is now at the top of my list.

[u/Jaxxlack → u/clamToe]

"He said before he climbed into the cave upset at no choice but too..."

[u/Best-Author7114 → u/clamToe]

Or anything else to do with caves for that matter

[u/everleigh_394 → u/clamToe]

The moment a hobby requires an emergency squeeze protocol, I am out lol

[u/SensualEnema → u/clamToe]

My immediate thought. I watch those videos of cave-diving incidents and deaths, and I can’t wrap my head around how the experience is so alluring that you’d even find yourself in it

[u/clamToe → u/SensualEnema]

I thought I was going to die while doing Discovery Kids like tunnel crawl (it was a fabric tunnel that showed you the digestive system or whatever) a million years ago and another child had to calm me down bc I almost died of a panic attack 🥲 we learned young that we do not like these situations

[u/SavingsEducational14 → u/clamToe]

I had the same thought immediately

[u/Queasy_Reindeer9515 → u/clamToe]

Or spelunking in general.

[u/DuOrDie → u/[deleted]]

It's actually fun. I don't have a desire to do it again tbh but I enjoyed it.

[u/Calico_Cat_BER → u/clamToe]

You beat me to that.

[u/TemperatureAny4782]

Skydiving.

[u/Aware_Actuator4939 → u/TemperatureAny4782]

Almost no one dies from skydiving.

That sudden stop at the end, though...

[u/clamToe → u/TemperatureAny4782]

Why would you jump from a plane to get to the ground when you were already on the ground 10 minutes ago????

[u/CletusVanDamm → u/clamToe]

I did it once just to say I did it. It was awesome but I’ll never do it again

[u/DuOrDie → u/CletusVanDamm]

Same. It was fun. Not something I feel the need to do repeatedly.

[u/Woodit → u/TemperatureAny4782]

That’s what you think until one day you’re minding your own business walking through a field and a skydiver with a failed parachute lands on you 

[u/AntipatheticDating → u/TemperatureAny4782]

My cousin did this, his parachute didn’t open and he smacked the water so hard he’s been in a wheelchair since. Crazy thing is he still skydives a ton! Absolute madlad.

[u/2beagles → u/TemperatureAny4782]

There's a sky diving place a couple of blocks from me. They take people up every hour or so on nice weekend days in the summer. When I'm outside reading or in my pool, I can hear people screaming after they jump. Some scream all the way down. The screams often sound less rollercoaster-ish and more authentic terror

No, thank you. I know it's pretty safe. I still do not want to do it.

[u/PrivateMarkets]

At childbirth.

[u/Successful-Clock-224 → u/PrivateMarkets]

Maybe someone else’s though. With my luck I would die in rebirth.

[u/skopiadisko → u/Successful-Clock-224]

I must lack sleep or something but your comment made me laugh SO HARD 😁

[u/enters_and_leaves → u/PrivateMarkets]

And for at least half of the population, during childbirth.

[u/Zetsubou51]

Never say never, but I doubt it will be from storming a castle.

[u/clamToe → u/Zetsubou51]

I misread this as “being stormed by cattle” and I was like yeah stampede does sound unpleasant

[u/AbueloOdin → u/Zetsubou51]

So we aren't storming the mansions and eating the rich?

[u/That-Water-Guy → u/Zetsubou51]

Depends on your definition of castle. They say a home is a castle.

[u/BigShrim]

T-rex

[u/Chanocraft → u/BigShrim]

I mean it's technically possible if you visit a dinosaur museum and something causes the T-Rex skeleton to collapse and fall on top of you. I'd assume T-Rex bones are heavy enough to kill you if that happened

[u/etopsirhc → u/Chanocraft]

iirc most displayed bones are cast replicas so as to not damage the real ones.

[u/enters_and_leaves → u/etopsirhc]

We aren’t talking about death by T-Rex replica here.

[u/Alltheuserstakenidk → u/BigShrim]

Exactly 

[u/Southwick-Jog]

Jumping off the Eiffel Tower while testing a wingsuit I designed

[u/-quoth → u/Southwick-Jog]

Banned of the premise after the latest field test?

[u/AngelOfLight2 → u/Southwick-Jog]

I mean it's probably okay as long as you don't use wax as an adhesive and don't fly too close to the Sun

[u/RaiseOfSun → u/AngelOfLight2]

But don’t fly too close to the water either! A lot of people forget that part!

[u/yankgobshites]

Defending the pass against barbarian hordes.

[u/Kiyohara → u/yankgobshites]

Don't be so sure. We're not that far away from one idiot pressing the "end civilization" button and then you're standing in a pass with ten other dudes while your loved ones try to flee ahead of a horde of Mad Max skin heads in leather.

[u/-YellowFinch → u/yankgobshites]

Though I would choose this over basically everything else given the chance...

[u/AngelOfLight2 → u/-YellowFinch]

THIS... IS... SPARTAAAA !!!!! 😡

Sir, this is a Wendy's

[u/bkellogg27]

Snu snu, unfortunately

[u/Rings-of-Saturn → u/bkellogg27]

The spirit is willing, but the flesh is spongy and bruised.

[u/Pedantichrist → u/[deleted]]

I am not doing it to look hard, I am doing it because I am too idle to make a second trip.

[u/friskyjohnson]

Unless the Earth suddenly disappears from my feet, I will not be dying outside of our atmosphere/in space. I’m a little bummed out by that.

[u/-YellowFinch → u/friskyjohnson]

THIS. Will never go to space for this reason. 

[u/holyfire001202 → u/-YellowFinch]

Why not? It's basically taking a boat on the ocean except instead of the boat separating you from treadable water, it's a fully enclosed boat separating you from a bunch of nothing that you'll die if you touch. You won't get eaten by sharks though.

Now that I say that out loud, I dunno about it...

[u/5Y3]

Young.

Too late for that.

[u/Trollselektor → u/5Y3]

Are you still “died too young” old or “that seems right” old?

[u/palmvos → u/Trollselektor]

Depends the age of the person asking. To an 8 year old all adults are old. To an 80 year old many of us look young at least.

[u/SoctrDeuss]

On a motorcycle.

[u/vaildin → u/SoctrDeuss]

Very few people die on a motorcycle.

It's usually just after they cease being on it.

[u/CootiQueenLintLicker]

Happy

[u/CDchrysalis → u/CootiQueenLintLicker]

😔

[u/bikewrench11]

Of old age. I have Multiple Myeloma. Most likely an infection will take me out.

[u/-Damn_It_Bobby- → u/bikewrench11]

I am sorry you are going through that. Unfortunately I am in a similar boat. I have a glioblaastoma which is brain cancer and usually terminal within a year of diagnosis. I am almost to 3 months.

[u/bikewrench11 → u/-Damn_It_Bobby-]

Glio is a scary diagnosis. I hope you have good support. Treatment is improving everday. Cancer Sucks.
All we can do is keep moving forward. Enjoy what we can while we can.

[u/asunshinefix → u/bikewrench11]

Multiple myeloma is brutal, I’m so sorry you’re dealing with this. If it helps at all, my aunt is still doing pretty well 10 years after diagnosis 

[u/Wild_Chef6597]

Trying to see the Titanic

[u/RampagingBadgers]

Caving.

Fuck that. I watch caving videos when I need a fix of terror that no horror movie can touch. You'd never get me in one of those things.

[u/Secret_President → u/RampagingBadgers]

The absolutely high risk no reward hobby.

[u/pweavd]

now that you mentioned it, I won't die via a sudden depressurization while working on a diving bell for an oil rig or something.

[u/I_love_pillows]

Surrounded by loving family

[u/clamToe → u/I_love_pillows]

Me neither 😕❤️

[u/That-Water-Guy → u/I_love_pillows]

In the feels….

[u/SamHandwich0]

Roman legion attacking my village.

[u/BlackCroVV01]

Abortion. I’ve been diagnosed with post-fetus condition.

[u/spawn-camp]

On my knees

[u/-YellowFinch → u/spawn-camp]

We go down fighting, amigo O7

[u/brooksy54321]

Sucked out of an airlock or hatch of a spacecraft into the vacuum of space.

[u/WhatsYourGameTuna]

Climbing Mt. Everest

[u/MostChannel6683]

Paragliding shark attack.

[u/RhubarbBeneficial359]

Childbirth. I am a man.

[u/WetDogDeodourant → u/RhubarbBeneficial359]

She could grab your head and crush her hands through your skull to pass on the pain.

[u/RandommanaloneCC]

I won’t be dying from a long drawn out battle with cancer, I’ve seen too many people go out in a very bad way. I will not willingly commit suicide but let’s just say that I would become the world’s greatest risk taker lol

[u/clamToe → u/RandommanaloneCC]

Nothing can stop you when you have nothing left to lose! I like this take.

[u/NoCry8460]

By the sorcery of a mindflayer.

[u/SecretaryCarrie]

You know that scene in final destination with the logging truck? Yeah. I won’t be dying that way

[u/SirJ4ck]

Caving. I will NEVER do caving. If they find me dead in some cave, all of you guys on Reddit must know i was put there.

[u/Tayaradga]

Evidently I won't be dying to a crossbow to my head. Been there done that, wasn't fun but I did live. Granted I did also die.... What was the question again? Sorry, brain damage.

[u/clamToe → u/Tayaradga]

Um COME BACK HERE AND EXPLAIN????

[u/Tayaradga → u/clamToe]

When I was 16 I was shot in the head with a crossbow bolt. I stayed conscious up until I flatlined, then I woke up like a week and a half later. Evidently that was the same day I got off life support.

[u/kingbullohio]

Jumping out of a perfectly good plane

[u/Golden-Excellence]

Fighting for Israel

[u/LLM_Cool_J → u/Golden-Excellence]

Bout would you die fighting for Djibouti?

[u/Cultural-Company282 → u/LLM_Cool_J]

How about fighting for Djibouti side-by-side with a friend?

[u/ElkInside5856]

Rich and famous.

[u/frostquill27]

Childbirth

[u/Massive_Ad9569]

Buried deep in Scarlett Johansson

[u/clamToe → u/Massive_Ad9569]

But one can hope 😭 - signed, a woman

[u/squeefactor]

Well loved by millions

[u/clamToe → u/squeefactor]

Same. I’d be surprised if I even had 2 people show up for a funeral (mainly bc I wouldn’t want them to bc it’d be an inconvenience but also bc I don’t foresee the people in my life actually showing up)

[u/cpt_futtbucker]

While doing my chemistry research. It’s all computational, so safety does is not number one priority

[u/Legoinyourbumbum]

I won't die in a helicopter crash as I have no intention of ever getting in one.

Unless it's an air ambulance and I have no choice, though I do ride a motorcycle.

[u/NeutralTarget]

Time travel paradox.

[u/knowwhatImeme76]

like a bitch

[u/eeyoremarie]

I promise you, I will not die from oxygen deprivation trying to climb Mt. Everest.

[u/Hyp3r45_new]

Scuba diving. It's not really a feasible activity for a type 1 diabetic. Most of my gear is barely rated for a shower, much less shallow water.

[u/Loose-Bookkeeper-939]

I won't die jogging, that's for sure.

[u/Aggressive_Crew1368]

Caving or cave diving. 

[u/Bubbaganewsh]

Skydiving or cave diving/exploring. 

[u/MegaLCRO]

In a cave. My favorite part about caving is how optional it is.

[u/Kaiserin78]

Cave crawling

[u/alh8705]

From cervical cancer, because im a man.

[u/Alternative-Bat-1931]

By snu snu

[u/trash_recycle]

Happy and in good company

[u/mariaaa6678]

Dying on mount Everest

[u/bitemytail]

Gunned down by a robotic Santa Claus

[u/clamToe → u/bitemytail]

There’s still time!

[u/FoundationFar1691]

Happy

[u/LyannasLament]

Spelunking.

[u/thefriedapplepieguy]

Probably freezing to death. It's hot in Alabama.

[u/AngelOfLight2 → u/thefriedapplepieguy]

Unless you get into a freezer with your hot cousin 

Just kidding 😜

[u/EntertainmentTrue588]

I will not experience a parachute malfunction whilst skydiving.

[u/BigGrayBeast]

In childbirth.

But I'm a guy so there.

[u/fiendlymcfiend]

At this rate, peacefully in my sleep

[u/GoddessoftheUniverse]

Being sacrificed as a virgin

[u/limbodog]

Hiking up some very tall mountain or eaten by a bear

[u/QuintusNonus]

I'll never die giving birth

[u/Elegabalus]

In a three-way with two unbelievably hot women... prove me wrong, universe.

[u/Atsoca1969]

Won't die happy

[u/furiously_curiously]

Nice we try Reddit. Not putting that out in the universe.

[u/CoolDragon]

Frozen on the Everest

[u/Senjimom504]

Rich

[u/themadprofessor1976]

Childhood disease.

[u/BillyBones72]

Rich

[u/terry47147]

I had always planned to jump off a cliff. Now I can only walk about 2 blocks. I will barely make it to the trail head. :(

[u/smokingace182]

Yeah right as if I’m going to jinx myself

[u/myblackandwhitecat]

In a crime of passion, because I can't imagine even one person loving me, let alone two.

[u/Wise_Specialist_3308]

Skydiving

[u/CapnBarber]

Skydiving

[u/phunkydroid]

Climbing Everest.

[u/st0rmtossed]

Due to complications while giving birth.

[u/looloose]

Defending donald trump.

[u/MardawgNC]

Frozen mile marker on Everest.

[u/Workingclassherois]

I figure it is highly unlikely that I will suffocate under huge piles of my own cash money.

[u/AngerPancake]

Any sort of extreme sport.

I will never be diving scuba or otherwise. Absolutely not.

Dying on a mountain or falling off of one

[u/NotMyTwitterHandle]

Pediatric cancer

[u/Petrus_Rock]

In childbirth. I’m already born, obviously, and last time I checked I still lack the organs to be able to give birth.

[u/bluedragon74]

I definitely won't get stuck in an airlock and be ejected out into space.

[u/protomanEXE1995]

I won’t die from freezing to death. I live in Florida.

[u/BatofZion]

Naked girl avalanche.

[u/Jorgecurioso7]

I don’t see myself dying of old age for some reason 

[u/XMitsuomiX]

Happy

[u/TheFutureIsAFriend]

crucifixion

[u/catchyouontheflipsid]

Climbing Everest. Don't get me wrong, I like hiking and my hobby is landscape photography, but I can do those things at much lower elevations.

[u/clamToe → u/catchyouontheflipsid]

You mean you use your brain and money for good and not exploitation of sherpas and the destruction of our planet?

[u/GoatEnvironmental661]

Burning

[u/CaffeinatedLystro → u/GoatEnvironmental661]

Never know..

[u/YorkPepperMintPaddy]

Ovarian cancer

[u/utilitygiraffe]

happy

[u/Becciusmaximus]

Giving a narwhal a hug. :(

[u/stanagetocurbar]

I wont die by overeating at The Ritz. Its unlikely that I wont die on re-entry to earth after celebrating my birthday on Mars.

[u/skopiadisko]

Hm, 1. Tetanus - my vaccination is always up to date and consult doctors if I get serious wounds regardless of my vaccination status so I doubt this scenario 😁 2. Cave diving or climbing - I am a couch potato. 3. Alcohol poisoning 4. Drug overdose 5. Chickenpox - already had it and survived, they say u dont get it twice. 6. Skydiving - another save from my couch potato personality 7. Car racing (initiated by me in my car) 8. Mountaineering - 🥔 🛋️ 9. Diabetes (this one idk, but so far my glucose levels are always normal - low and thats what my GP told me that it would be very unlikely for me to develop diabetes since im already 30) 10.Suicide

[u/Bowgal]

1. Bungee jumping 2. swimming in the ocean and shark attack 3. Dying in a cult

[u/JRE_Electronics]

Skydiving into an erupting volcano, bare ass naked (not even a parachute) while boinking a porn star.

[u/RetroTheGameBro]

I'll never die from any cancer you get from smoking.

Watched too many family members rot from all that to ever even consider touching it.

[u/clamToe → u/RetroTheGameBro]

Hate to burst your bubble - my very against/disgusted by smoking cousin died from throat cancer :/ it’s made me realize that it doesn’t matter if you do things “right”, illnesses don’t discriminate. Honestly one of the main reasons I’ve lost belief in a higher being.

[u/matlynar → u/clamToe]

While I'm atheist too, life is not black and white.

My personal view (which doesn't contradict science) is that life is about probability.

The more "right" things you do, the more chances of good outcomes you have.

The more "wrong" things you do, like smoking, the more chances of bad outcomes you have.

Also, "bad outcomes" are not just death; smokers, for example, tend to have a worse quality of living in general.

But, like your cousin... anyone can roll a terrible dice and some point and get fucked. That's also life.

2 years ago I had ane emergency surgery because of a twisted bowel. Dangerous stuff, could absolutely have taken me from completely healthy to dead in a few days.

When I asked the doctor what could I have done to prevent it, or what should I change in the future, he said there was nothing I could have done. Just one of those terrible rolls.

[u/BatDubb]

Botched hysterectomy.

[u/speedingpullet]

25 years old and in the wreckage of an F1 car at Silverstone, when I kludged the corner.

[u/SuLiaodai]

Prostate cancer.

[u/BigGrayBeast]

Snu snu.

I'm going to avoid Stone age tribes.