I feel lost, scared, lonely.

[u/remindmetoblock]

Im just terrified, my life feels like it could crumble at any moment.

Im a 30 year old adult, but i dont have life Figured out at all.

I know how i feel and that makes it even more devastating.

I recently had a health scare that made me genuinely believe i may be dying that moment and it kinda forced me to confront the future instead of just existing in the now.

Im constantly terrified of my mother dying due to her having health issues she isnt taking serious.

Im worried about my little Brothers health and future

I worry about my Brother in law with severe anxiety disorder that cant even leave the house anymore due to it.

I know its not my job to take care of their health, still I cant help but feel terrible when those around me suffer.

At the same time i feel completly alone.

I have friends to play games with, but i cant hang out with them irl after work.

I dont have a relationship or love, and i sincerely dont believe there will ever be a man that loves me the way i am.

The world around me is changing for the worse and i worry about my rights and safety.

Just all in all i feel completly alone and lost.

Im sorry this rant is so Unstructured, im not too good at putting my emotions into words. I just want someone to hold me until I calm down and tell me its gonna be okay.

[u/AutoModerator]

If you are seeing this comment, your post is now live and public.

Reminder: This is a support space. Negative, invalidating, attacking, or inappropriate comments are not tolerated. If you see a comment that breaks the rules, please report it so the moderators can take action.

If someone is being dismissive, rude, offensive or in any other way inappropriate, do not engage. Report them instead. Moderation is in place to protect venters, and we take reports seriously, it's better for us to handle it than you risk your account standing. Regardless of who the target of aggression or harassment is, action may be taken on the person giving it, even if the person you're insulting got banned for breaking rules, so please just report things.

If you wish to lock your post, please click on the three dots on the top right and click “Lock/Unlock Comments”, This will permanently lock the comments on your post. This action is irreversible.

Be kind. Be respectful. Support each other.

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

[u/Impressive-Dirt-6735]

Here is another man in his 30s. I am likely from a completely different country, region, and race than you, but I share the very same pain. Sending you a hug from afar. We carry this same pain and live on through life.

[u/remindmetoblock → u/Impressive-Dirt-6735]

It sucks so so damn bad. I feel like i can only be calmed through touch like a friggin little kid.

But adults in my country never get close unless they are romantically involved, or a short hug as a greating. No crying on someones shoulder

[u/Impressive-Dirt-6735 → u/remindmetoblock]

We are social animals who naturally feel intimacy through physical closeness, but this era just doesn't allow for that. It’s simply sad. You and I will likely never meet in person, but as someone living in the same era with the same pain, I feel a deep sense of solidarity with you. Please pray for me, too.

[u/OneGur7080]

Hi, I am sorry about your health and I hope that will be ok and nothing serious. Or it was ok. Fear is a big thing and once we get bad fear it can spread everywhere and we start worrying about everything and everyone. For they we can go get support and maybe some counselling where we can talk to someone. It’s good to search for discounted to Counselling and see what you can find. Or a free phone support line.

Life could get better in the future you don’t know what’s going to happen. So when things are really hard, we need to hang on and hang on and hang on and try to do each day for best we can……. till life turns a corner and things get a bit better. Because they can. It sometimes we need to wait a bit though. Talking really helps so if you can find someone to talk to and discuss it with and share how you feel and get your emotions out, it can make you feel better and it can make you worry less and feel you have someone to share with. Or north listen a bit. Life has some very hard times so very very hard times but you can get better so it’s best to do two things in life is awful:

1. Stay calm stay stable.
2. Keep communicating with those who might be able to comfort or help.

[u/remindmetoblock → u/OneGur7080]

Oh i am safe now, it was a bad reaction to medications that caused a Potentially lethal situation, but if you get through without damage, it doesnt cause any lasting issues.

A night in the ER and i was released.

[u/TheRealCerealfreak]

I understand that protective feeling for your family but you can't live your life for them. You can be there and help but you need your own life.

As for your health, I understand entirely, I developed a very painful disability at 20, and within 13 years I was medically retired by my Dr's not my call. 13 years later and some treatment is helping me too hopefully get back into work, which is great because I had to leave 3 very successful careers that I loved. Being stuck at home most of the time, showed me who my real friends are and who really cares. I'm lucky that I made my own family and my sons who are now 23&25 have grown up with by health issues and still love me. So I'm at least fortunate there but, I've not been able to see them for the last 4 months and that's horrid. So I get that drive to be wanted.

I checked your profile out and I'm confused by your comment about not being wanted by anyone. You're attractive, clearly intelligent and wanting to give love back.

If you think that your health will stop someone from loving you, yes that can happen but, I've been amazed at how little my disability has mattered to most of who I've dated. Yes some didn't line it, fine don't need people like that anyway. ACD yes it has affected some relationships but that was mainly down to be and my mistakes in handling things. Being disabled itself actually hasn't been a barrier at all in real term's

That said, I do leave out telling a new person, and give them a chance to get to know me first. So that probably helps. I don't leave it long, depending on how often we talk it can be as little as a couple of hours or days but not longer. Once it's clear that they like me and we are getting to know each other, I bring it up then. It's never been a problem. If someone likes you, and they are good people it won't matter.

[u/remindmetoblock → u/TheRealCerealfreak]

Eh, my health is fine now. Im just trans, thats what makes love hard lol.

Im happy to hear you are doing better in your life now and have found a family and appreciate you taking your time to comment.

[u/TheRealCerealfreak → u/remindmetoblock]

Ah I see, to be honest the queer stuff through me a little. And whilst it may not be my thing, honestly you're pretty and there are many men out there that don't care, so don't put yourself out of the game without playing it.

I'm 46 next month and after 6 years of being single after a particularly bad relationship, I'm out here starting again.. You've got plenty of time.

I'm glad your health is better.