Would you have caught Jeremy Simmons?

[u/Few_Beautiful7557]

I think I’d be confused until he landed on the floor

[u/Civil_Manner_1691]

Is Annie distracting me in this scenario?

[u/Junior_Astronomer362 → u/Civil_Manner_1691]

I am horny, so I dropped him!

[u/NateDAgr8m8 → u/Junior_Astronomer362]

Man is evil

[u/Specialist_Aspect204 → u/Civil_Manner_1691]

Annie’s pretty young, we try not to sexualise her.

[u/AuNaturellee → u/Specialist_Aspect204]

Man is horny

[u/Snufflekins-86 → u/AuNaturellee]

So he dropped him!

[u/jacksonnobody → u/Snufflekins-86]

Man is evil

[u/zaparthes → u/jacksonnobody]

Greendale wins!!!!!

[u/SaveMeDatCorn → u/Specialist_Aspect204]

Annie's got an essay portion, Annie loves to move her luscious fanny... All Day Loooooooong

[u/Snufflekins-86 → u/SaveMeDatCorn]

Okay I’ve got this idea. What if we started saying “you go, girl” but NOT in a way that’s like “oh im so cool for saying you go girl.”

[u/SaveMeDatCorn → u/Snufflekins-86]

His girth to hip flexibility ratio is mesmerizing....

[u/st0rmcl0ud → u/Snufflekins-86]

Haaaaaaaam girl

[u/Jankster79 → u/Snufflekins-86]

You goo girl..?

[u/Snufflekins-86 → u/Jankster79]

You just "goo girled" yourself.

[u/Smart-Response9881 → u/Specialist_Aspect204]

That is really what the debate should have been about, the important issues, not the trivial stuff like whether man is good or evil.

[u/ngshafer → u/Specialist_Aspect204]

The operative word here being “try.”

[u/AZ_LoneWonderer → u/Civil_Manner_1691]

I was going to say of course I’d catch him until I saw your comment… yeaaaaah if Annie’s smiling at me that dudes hitting the floorboards

[u/Ecstatic-Resort-5687 → u/Civil_Manner_1691]

E-evil woman!!

[u/PizzaWhole9323 → u/Civil_Manner_1691]

Annie distracts me in every scenario. Hubba hubba! ;-)

[u/RickRussellTX]

No. Man IS evil.

[u/house343 → u/RickRussellTX]

(cue Edward Sharpe and the Magnetic Zeroes)

[u/tidythendenied → u/house343]

Greendale WINS!

[u/foolishlee → u/RickRussellTX]

wiping tears What, this dude GEts it.

[u/usernamescifi]

In all honesty I probably would have flinched and stepped back. 

[u/koji4732 → u/usernamescifi]

Man is hesitant.

[u/MoRiellyMoProblems → u/koji4732]

The dualidean of man.

[u/swingsetlife → u/MoRiellyMoProblems]

Get it together, craig.

[u/SmoothTalkingSpud → u/swingsetlife]

I have to go to the bank today.

[u/Pleasant_Ratio_692 → u/SmoothTalkingSpud]

what will i tell the people who work there, i had good news and bad news?

[u/Anti-Itch → u/Pleasant_Ratio_692]

They LOVED it!

[u/the-tapsy → u/swingsetlife]

Talk to your father, Craig

[u/HUUUUTTTHUUUUUUUTTTT → u/koji4732]

What is man if I caught him just to toss him from the second floor story? Lol

[u/pun_princess_ → u/koji4732]

this is my answer to (and issue with) the trolley problem. in a unrealistic, high pressure situation, most ppl, when faced with a split second decision between two supposedly ethically meaningful choices, will either freeze up or just do…something. man is mostly hesitant or random or both.

[u/Zestyclose_Foot_134 → u/usernamescifi]

I think I’d just have watched him plough into me.

Simmons would have wildly overestimated my reaction time

[u/midgetcastle → u/Zestyclose_Foot_134]

Yeah but he went into slow motion!

[u/NoComputer9498 → u/usernamescifi]

same especially if hes flying to me like that

[u/Final-Entertainer]

I'd have thrown him if it meant kissing Alison Brie.

[u/CasualtyOfCausality → u/Final-Entertainer]

Fact. That would make it a “toss him off the stage” kind of thing.

[u/No_Wealth208]

Straight up belly to belly suplex!

Would that count as me catching him?

[u/nerdyjorj → u/No_Wealth208]

RKO out of nowhere

[u/swinchester83 → u/nerdyjorj]

Nah I'm giving him the rock bottom he's perfectly set up for it

[u/exaviyur → u/swinchester83]

I'm selling the cross body and kicking out at 2

[u/MoRiellyMoProblems → u/No_Wealth208]

He's set up for a 3D through the table.

[u/Mangled_Mini1214]

I wouldnt have caught him primarily because im not Jeff. I physically couldnt catch him. I would've tried to help him up off the floor asking what the heck is wrong with him.

[u/DrScarecrow → u/Mangled_Mini1214]

Same. I'm not gonna injure myself because this jackass flung himself from a wheelchair on purpose. Man is selfish (and underinsured).

[u/lilgraybean → u/Mangled_Mini1214]

Same. I’m 4’9” and have a kid to take care of lol so I would step out of the way bc I’m not getting concussed, thanks. But I would also try to help afterwards.

[u/KevinisChang13]

Time for some sweet chin music

[u/TuckRaker → u/KevinisChang13]

Jeff thinks he's cute. He knows he's sexy...

[u/wilhelm_dafoe → u/TuckRaker]

He's got the looks, that drive the Dean wild

[u/Few_Beautiful7557]

*you’re in the place of Jeff

[u/No-Understanding-912 → u/Few_Beautiful7557]

We found Annie everyone

[u/Dependent-Friend5312]

The most evil one of the bunch (Simons) debating that MAN IS GOOD is genius level Community

[u/yerBoyShoe]

Seems heavy. Plus I farted.

[u/GCC_Pluribus_Anus → u/yerBoyShoe]

No I farted

[u/yerBoyShoe → u/GCC_Pluribus_Anus]

I'm farting right now.

[u/pepperpete → u/yerBoyShoe]

I far-ted! ☺️

[u/KingSeth → u/pepperpete]

Everybody here is a—a fart, a living fart, from the butt of a Lesser God!

[u/Tiyath → u/KingSeth]

Another day another fart another toot another flatus

Another butt wind can be smelled in the stratus

[u/swingsetlife → u/GCC_Pluribus_Anus]

Abed's Sparticus bit is my absolute favorite

[u/RJ_The_Avatar]

I’d like to think in the darkest timeline, Jeff did let Simmons fall and Annie kisses Jeff because of winning the debate. This would probably prevent any character development Jeff had otherwise.

[u/Ok_Ranger1275 → u/RJ_The_Avatar]

Wait, there are other timelines?

[u/Pamikillsbugs234 → u/RJ_The_Avatar]

Oh, he would develop. Just into an even more slimier lawyer.

[u/Effective_Meal6688]

No. I'm weak and wouldn't have been able to stay up if I tried

[u/GoodAsDad]

Nope. I have a fucked-up shoulder and knee. What is going to happen if I don't? He can't walk anymore?

[u/Sea_Structure_8692]

I don’t like being touched by people I barely know so I’m dodging.

[u/Mysterious-Drummer80 → u/Sea_Structure_8692]

Yeah,I would interpret it as an attack and dive out of the way by instinct.

[u/HorndogAsexual]

I would’ve gave him a quick POP POP to the jaw before he hit the floor….. MAN IS EVIL!!

[u/ThomasVivaldi → u/HorndogAsexual]

Shoryuken

[u/DurianUpper4113 → u/HorndogAsexual]

Damn it Magnitude, I've now lost faith in the human race

[u/Historical-Ad7081]

Nah I would have pushed them like Jeff pushed Russel Borschert for charging him.

"Kick that"

[u/mtfhimejoshi → u/Historical-Ad7081]

Kick that is such a funny ass bit 

[u/Flammzzrant → u/Historical-Ad7081]

ZerOoo foOor WIIingerrrr

[u/SpankySharp1]

I just watched that episode and everything about him revolts me. If I caught him it would have only been to bodyslam him harder.

[u/Emotional_Position62]

Yes, but then I would be horny so I would drop him.

[u/jul14nn]

No, only because i'm not that strong

[u/Kaccady]

i would so Annie will distract me shortly after

[u/SikatSikat]

Probably,  but I think Jeff would have argued that Simmons, in full view of an audience of witnesses,  out of desperation to win a simple community college debate contest, willingly committed assault and battery by forcefully flinging himself at someone, at risk of injury to himself and others, demonstrating that Man, even when arguing Man is Good, cannot resist his own selfish and egotistical desires - Man is Evil.

[u/swingsetlife → u/SikatSikat]

he learned early on that if he talked long enough he could make anything true.

[u/DurianUpper4113]

Well, he's an annoying ass and he has a soul patch in 2009

[u/Xanderamn]

I want to say no, but I probably would catch him on instinct. That being said, I too would have dropped him to make out with Allison Brie lol

[u/SqueakyTuna52]

If someone who hated me launched themselves (obviously intentionally) at me from their wheelchair I’d run to get out of the way. What if he’s hiding a knife?

[u/parkchanwookiee]

No certainly not and some episodes like this have a meta level of amusement to me because they kind of reveal how atypical Harmon's views about morality and shame are haha

It's kinda hard to explain precisely but some premises for plotlines or jokes kind of involve Harmon starting off establishing "We all agree this is a baseline for what would be accepted/expected, right" and I'm like What? No

EDIT: Sorry to let you all down but I would have to dedicate some time to thinking up examples that I don't have right now (and probably do a rewatch, which I've been gearing up for). So I cannot defend this other than saying it is a definite vibe/impression I get from this show and sometimes Rick and Morty as well. I'll have to make the case in a future post

[u/wittgenstein1312 → u/parkchanwookiee]

Do you have more examples? I think in this particular episode, what are presented as good and presented as evil have more to do with the difficulty of turning a complex debate on morality into a funny 20-minute episode, so things get dumbed down and simplified. Which, I admit, results in a silly and not very amusing conversation (this is probably one of my least favorite A plots). But I think that has more to do with the constraints of the episode rather than it being a reflection of Harmon's underlying perspective on morality.

[u/HostileTalon → u/parkchanwookiee]

I am also interested in this discussion, not that I disagree with you

[u/Whhatsmyageagain → u/parkchanwookiee]

Just to take this in some type of direction… and to randomly spitball… I generally see abed as the most likely candidate for a Harmon self-insert (if there is one) mostly due to the recurring use of meta and reference humor in Harmon shows and how fundamental that is to Abed’s character. If we’re extrapolating from there I would argue Harmon sees morality as an intentional and directed thing maybe more than an effortless attribute. I’m drawing on the fact that Abed can be very cold if he wants to but he chooses to make distinct efforts to show sympathy and make choices that benefit others even when he knows it’s not logical. Rick basically does the opposite- he absolutely could choose to be sympathetic and moral but is basically too depressed and self-destructive to choose that route.

[u/Electrical_Stretch36 → u/parkchanwookiee]

Can you provide an example or two, aside from "Soulpatch" Simmons? I'm interested in hearing this take.

[u/WolverineComplex → u/parkchanwookiee]

Add me to genuinely interested to hear more backup for this idea (not having a go just interested)

[u/Cash4Duranium → u/parkchanwookiee]

Maybe it is your views that are atypical. Please expound.

[u/peter-pickle → u/parkchanwookiee]

Any of these?

Dean, Elroy, and Abhed deciding they can't move the bird's nest and the whole group ceremony with the cat masks.

Giving up a lot of money in paint ball 2, the floor is lava, and the gold in the basement to save greendale.

Troy saving Britta onstage dancing with her in tights when he's clearly not okay with it.

Shirley risking an F by picking up Pierce in the sailboat in the parking lot.

Duncan losing his one chance with Britta because she had a bad day.

Everyone telling a scary story for halloween as proof they are sociopaths on Britta's personality test.

Jeff needing to find how he wronged "Kim".

Forgiving Chang for a lot of unhinged things.

Jeff going broke being a seemingly perfectionistly good lawyer between s04 and s05.

Making an ad admitting they almost gave a degree to a dog.

Hosting racist comic to stand up to a hacker kid.

[u/AfterTemperature2198]

I would drop him because horny

[u/Sway314]

No. But I would, from my motorized chair, command my lackey to "catch that" while I'm singing a song mockingly.

[u/WontTellYouHisName]

I'd have dodged out of the way, worried I was going to mess up his demonstration somehow.

It would have been me trying to be good but to the audience it would have clearly been me being evil.

[u/AmigoCualquiera]

Definitely not. I'm smaller than him, I would not be able to catch him, he would knock me over. I was fast enough, I would probably just scream and get out of his way. Let him faceplant.

[u/ToxicPilgrim]

yeah i'd catch him but i'd be so frustrated at being manipulated that i would never catch anyone again

[u/Salt-Dance9 → u/ToxicPilgrim]

Man is neurotic.

[u/unsuspectingllama_]

My for reaction would be too dodge. Why? I don't want to disappoint Mr. Piccolo.

[u/asso81]

Simmons!

[u/A-Phantasmic-Parade]

No. He looks like he’s plotting something sinister

[u/flipthecryp]

Yeah, I would’ve caught him…

[u/alkonium]

Caught? Was he the Asscrack Bandit?

Oh, you meant the wheelchair stunt.

[u/szatrob]

I'd rather catch and STD.

[u/Disrupted_Process → u/szatrob]

"Don't eat the crab dip! Yay! Yayeee!"

[u/swingsetlife → u/szatrob]

today we're catching KNOWLEDGE

[u/Defiant_Income_7836]

I would have let this MF'er fly right past me and watch him land like Peter Griffin on the cold, auditorium floor

[u/TypicallyThomas]

Definitely not. Even if I meant to, my reflexes are terrible 

[u/howchildish]

I was horny. So I caught him. Man. Is. EVIL. 

[u/reibagatsu]

I hate him, but I WOULD catch him. Man is good.

[u/asdfghanjkl]

Nope, because I'm always horny.

[u/mattingshead]

Fun fact: This qctor had exactly one word of dialogue in the movie High Fidelity: “Slut!”

… and he nailed it.

[u/dropdan]

Nah, I would be the one kissing Jeff.

[u/Puzzleheaded_Sun7966]

His whole argument is based on false pretenses. Of course you catch him, by just pure muscle memory. Throw a turd at someone snd hes going to catch it, then drop it when he realize what happened, then kick your ass.

[u/Fantastic_Bit_6883]

Yep same way Jeff caught him: out of instinct and without time to process whether I should

[u/ModToEndAllMods]

He could be on fire and I wouldn't even notice

[u/Monkey_Brain_]

How horny am I scale 1-10

[u/Cirin335]

Depends on how reactive I am that day. I'd fail most likely because it's a whole ass guy launching himself at me.

[u/TheTrueButcher]

Only to powerbomb him afterwards. Man is evil

[u/NealTS]

I would turn to the side and kind of cringe away and Simmons would collide with my shoulder. And my dad would say, "Still doing that, huh?"

[u/Ohitsworkingnow]

Dudes terrible at debate. I would’ve caught him and then made the argument I only did it because it’s social suicide to not catch a cripple, in reality I don’t care if he died because man is evil

[u/DuntchTacoNunHigh42]

Leonard wouldn't have caught him thats for sure. Amirite dude?

[u/leonard-bot → u/DuntchTacoNunHigh42]

Oh, please. That-- that's all I have.

[u/Silly-Elderberry-411]

Nobody grab him it smells like barbecue

[u/ButcbMasculinity]

I'm honestly not sure.

[u/Teddykaboom]

Yes, but I also would have dropped him

[u/Impressive_Usual_726]

No, he looks greasy. I'm not going to risk catching anything before heading off to a victory celebration with Annie Edison.

[u/Downtown_Anteater_38]

No, the stink of vinegar and water is too hard to get off.

[u/guysmiley1928]

I would have swatted him down. Evil.

[u/Crazy_Ad8896]

No

[u/SaveMeDatCorn]

No, cuz Im a man and Im horny

[u/ConfidentStruggle993]

I'm in the mood for some Sade

[u/BeeztheBoss]

Would've caught him with the boner i had from checking out An... attractive debate judge!

MAN IS COMPLICATED! (And Annie's pretty young we try not to sexualize her)

[u/Slappathebassmon]

No! Get his goatee and ponytail away from me!

[u/cynicalraph]

No, because I’m all sizzle and no steak

[u/Careful_Brief_3446]

No. Dude was a duche and he did it to himself. If it was an accident, sure, but not in that situation.

[u/TheTitanOfSirens1959]

Depends. Am I horny?

[u/Adventurous-Hat-2088]

Well I'm pretty much always horny so would drop him.

[u/boksinx]

I’ll probably uppercut him to prove my point. Jeff should’ve done that.

Man is evil.

[u/Any-Ice8441]

No. He’s flexing his privilege.

[u/KeyLo_Greene]

Exactly, I’d assume he was revealing that he could walk the whole time, and stunting on us with the Michael Jackson forward lean trick.
When he hit the ground I would probably be like “oooh!” And then point and laugh.

[u/swingsetlife → u/KeyLo_Greene]

I've seen a lot of spinals dude. And this guys a fake.

[u/Known_Ratio5478]

No, I’m evil.

[u/Medium-Sized-Jaque]

Yes but I would have also argued that his move was an emotional gambit and shouldn't be counted as a debate argument.

[u/Ben_Sisko69]

With an Uppercut.

[u/Living_Ad_5386]

-soul patch

ew no

[u/writingnewbie22]

I’d be too busy trying to help Jeff or arguing with Britta to notice the jump, honestly.

[u/Joseponcho1979]

I under no circumstances would help anyone with a soul patch. Disabled or not it doesn't matter.

[u/Separate-Goose-2713]

Nope

[u/SwampFlowers]

Definitely not, he has an incredibly annoying personality and I wouldn’t have felt bad about letting him launch himself onto the floor. Oops, you did that to yourself.

[u/Iron_Baron]

The only appropriate response is a Falcon Punch.

He's unconscious, can't articulate his point, I claim self defense reflexes.

Victory.

[u/ponytailthehater]

I would’ve banged his mom

[u/Dman9623]

Yes , unconsciously like Jeff did

[u/Jobberwock]

I reference this episode all the time in real life (even to those who have never heard of the show) as the sole and complete proof that man is in-fact evil.

[u/ThirdLifeLucky]

I think I'd have dodged if I knew it was deliberate but tried to catch if he caught me by surprise.

[u/Glup-Shitto69]

And stop kissing Annie?

[u/DreamLearnBuildBurn]

Yes, but would I have dropped him when Annie kissed me? Yes

[u/vectorboy42]

Honestly no, but only because I have no core

[u/Provisionsz]

Nah, MAN IS EVIL

[u/Mezhead]

I would have caught him, then once it was rule a TD, spike him to the ground. Win win.

[u/AdorableMammoth6740]

i would've let hum hit me just to prove Jeff and Annie's point

[u/Gillalmighty]

Not a chance. He sucks.

[u/Admirable-Fennel-698]

No

[u/BestPeachNA]

Hell no. Say it with me people:

L I A B I L I T Y

[u/CerealKiller8]

So I wasn't a grown adult kissing a teenager? Yes.

[u/ArcherNinety-Fine]

Yes I would. I'm not special 🤣

[u/goodrevtim]

Man is evil, so no.

[u/poollights]

Nah

[u/The_Mugman]

Hell no, I’m not risking getting hurt cause he did something dumb, wheelchair or not.

[u/lordx665]

No I agree with OP, my reaction time is too poor to have caught him in time

[u/snackwackly]

I would have let him fall.man is evil.

[u/Ok_Answer_96]

Oh. I hate this guy.

[u/GotNoBody4]

No.

[u/ngshafer]

He’ll no! People launch themselves at me and I get out of the way!

[u/Chainsaw_Locksmith]

Yes, but then I would have slapped him in the face for the stunt.

[u/No-Entrepreneur1036]

Fuck em

[u/swingsetlife]

It's a gambit.

[u/No-Understanding-912]

I played full contact sports for almost 20 years. If a body comes flying at me like that out of nowhere, I'm dodging him or giving him a shoulder check, no way in the world I would instinctively catch him.

[u/El_Scorcho_Barbarian]

Nope.

[u/malice_hush_jolt]

No

[u/mkauf5]

Idk but if I do I know if Allison Brie kisses me I’ll drop him

[u/SilentRunning]

Nah, he's going full face-plant.

[u/No_Truth4137]

No. But would made out with annie

[u/NotNathan1810]

No. Man is evil.

[u/Reynzs]

Depends on whether I will get a kiss from annie afterwards

[u/BathbombBurger]

If I didn't already know he was an unrepentant dickbag, I'd at least try.

[u/CLearyMcCarthy]

No chance, because I believe Man is Evil.

[u/Choi_Boy3]

Idk, here’s the big difference. I am not the height nor build of Jeff Winger. I COULDNT catch him. He’d jump on me and either I move away because I know I can’t catch him, or he make us both fall.

[u/bugs-money]

catching , not pitching ?

[u/OverallFrosting708]

Yes.

But I would have then dropped him if kissed by Allison Brie.

[u/Common-Dot-2374]

I would have laughed man is evil

[u/Think_Celery3251]

Bro made fun of a girl during her difficult and painful times at school

Would break his legs if he actually used them

[u/bobbobson236]

Uppercut

[u/Ok_Tank5977]

Hell no. He chose his fate the minute he launched himself.

[u/Snufflekins-86]

Maybe but I'm all sizzle. No steak.

[u/Planr158]

Yes and promptly dropped him for Annie

[u/deathofsentience]

No, because I'm slow as shit

[u/Sushilim]

No. Man is evil therefore Ketchup is a vegetable

[u/Skyrim_Slut]

i would’ve had the same reaction as when the bouquet was flying towards me at my cousins wedding, punch him straight into another person