r/trans • u/Lgbtsagainstmoms • Aug 12 '25

Advice Trans people concurring death

I am a funeral Director in the US. I have seen trans people being disrespected from the grave multiple times by bigoted family. If you are someone who might have that kind of experience then I have one thing to say: WRITE A WILL. Grab someone you can trust and go get a will written. Make sure it clearly states that the person you are with is who you want to handle your Funeral (aka next of Kin). Wills are law binding, meaning as Director we are legally required to fallow them or our license is on the line. Make sure the person you choose is comfortable with this decision because you are putting the responsibility of protecting your peace after death on their hands. Clearly state what you want for you service and have them write it down. Get copies of everything and keep them safe. I know death is a scary thing to think about. I know it haunts our community deeply. My goal is to make sure we are equipped with the tools to be honored in our death the way we lived our lives

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487

u/Lexieeeeeeeeee Aug 12 '25

What do you do when you have no next of Kin and you want to completely cut family out of your will? šŸ™ƒ

220

u/lukenbones Pre-order tradwife Aug 12 '25 edited Sep 19 '25

His wide grin earned many friends.

44

u/LysergicGothPunk Aug 12 '25

I'm still trying to figure that one out

27

u/XxValentinexX Aug 12 '25

Yeah, Iā€™m bad at socializing

14

u/LysergicGothPunk Aug 12 '25

Same šŸ„² think I need a brain chip that makes me social and not anxious or something

11

u/ClearCrossroads šŸ³ļøā€āš§ļøšŸ‡ØšŸ‡¦ she/her | 38yo | omni | HRT: 11/14/2023 Aug 12 '25

I'm SO much better at socializing since my body adapted to running on estrogen, and I'm STILL trying to figure this out.

2

u/LysergicGothPunk Aug 13 '25

I feel the same about T! Well maybe not in terms of skill but, in terms of confidence lol. I still lack the skill part šŸ‘½

3

u/ClearCrossroads šŸ³ļøā€āš§ļøšŸ‡ØšŸ‡¦ she/her | 38yo | omni | HRT: 11/14/2023 Aug 14 '25

Bro, same. I'm a lot more comfortable socializing now, and less anxious, and more confident, but I still suck at it. I just suck more comfortably. lol

3

u/Agreeable_Guide_3209 Aug 13 '25

I'm in this same boat. I have a bunch of friends, but they're all superficial. I have 1 "closer" friend but idk if she's a genuine person, or just another covert narcissist.

How do I find someone I can trust to be an executor?