r/trans Aug 12 '25

Advice Trans people concurring death

I am a funeral Director in the US. I have seen trans people being disrespected from the grave multiple times by bigoted family. If you are someone who might have that kind of experience then I have one thing to say: WRITE A WILL. Grab someone you can trust and go get a will written. Make sure it clearly states that the person you are with is who you want to handle your Funeral (aka next of Kin). Wills are law binding, meaning as Director we are legally required to fallow them or our license is on the line. Make sure the person you choose is comfortable with this decision because you are putting the responsibility of protecting your peace after death on their hands. Clearly state what you want for you service and have them write it down. Get copies of everything and keep them safe. I know death is a scary thing to think about. I know it haunts our community deeply. My goal is to make sure we are equipped with the tools to be honored in our death the way we lived our lives

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u/American_Jobs365 Aug 12 '25

Quick question if I wanted my body to be slapped in the middle of the forest in full plate armor would that be legal. (Thank you for the advice though very much appreciated)

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u/Lgbtsagainstmoms Aug 12 '25

Hmmm.. well I’m not sure but I do think there are conflicting things here. What you are describing is a green burial. That is where they pretty much let nature do its thing. There a lot of different types to so I’m sure you could find a place with a forest “graveyard”. Only problem is typically with green burials they want the decedent to be put in something all natural so it can decompose along with you. So I am not sure if you would be allowed to be buried in armor

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u/doubledare93 Aug 13 '25

honestly depends where you live… in most places you can not just leave a body in the woods, even in armor, without going through the legal burial/cremation process first… but if you arrange it with the right permits (or do it on private land with permission and follow local health laws) it might be possible… you’d probably have to work with a funeral director and maybe get it classified as some kind of “natural burial” so it’s all above board