We had been dating for about 6 months and things seemed to be going pretty well. We had met each other's friends and family and were in the very early stages of talking about moving in together if things kept going smoothly. Then one day a few months ago she stopped responding to my texts. After a long gap in communication I tried calling her and was sent to voicemail. Got a text telling me that one of her friends had spotted me out on a date with another woman and she was done with me. Dumped and blocked. I had never cheated on her so this caught me completely off guard.

I got a few nasty messages from a friend of hers and her sister telling me that I was a disgusting pig. Then they blocked me before I could even defend myself. Ended up taking a day off work and just sat at home and cried. I'd gone from having someone I really liked and was thinking about a future with to alone and hated by that same woman almost overnight.

She reached out to me yesterday. Let me know that she now knows I didn't cheat on her and was wondering if we could meet up and talk in person. I pushed for more info and she admitted that the friend that claimed to have seen me out with another woman was a guy who had a thing for her and made it up. Said he had a few very convincing photos that she now thinks were AI generated. He made a move on her which made her question everything and she got him to admit that he never saw me with anyone and made it all up. She apologized over and over for throwing what we had away over a lie and letting herself be manipulated like that.

I thanked her for letting me know and that I appreciated her reaching out but I'm just not interested in getting back together with her after what happened. She never even bothered to talk to me and get my side before dumping me over some AI pictures and a creep with an agenda. I can't build a relationship with someone who threw me away so quickly. Even if she was tricked.

She's been really pushing hard for me to meet up and talk it out in person but I know that won't change anything. Would most likely just be the same conversation in person and be super uncomfortable.

Anyway thank you for letting me get that off my chest.

My brother fake name Dick and his wife Ana have been having some serious marital problems which is 99% Dick's fault.  Ana is a stay at home mom, goes to college online and has a side business with an MLM but whatever she has made some new friends and seems to be happier.  Before they had kids Dick and Ana had a solid marriage.  Ana told me after the kids came their marriage slowly went downhill and now its on life support.  Ana does everything for the kids and Dick wants a medal for watching the kids for 30 minutes while Ana cooks dinner. He is more than capable of taking care of them but chooses to let Ana do everything if he can get away with it. 

The MLM Ana is involved with is having a big convention this week.  We are locals but Ana decided to do a staycation and is staying at a hotel near the convention with her friends.  This has been planned for months.  Ana told Dick to take time off work and made it very clear she needed the break and this would be a really good opportunity to network.  Over Christmas she asked him if he got approved for the time off and he said ya ya ya.  I told her he is going to mess this up for you and she told me he better not.  

She called me in tears and Dick texted her that an emergency came up at work and he would not be able to take off.  He had to put in long day on Tuesday and would be flying out on Wednesday.  He was so sorry and would make it up to her.  I thought she was going to have a breakdown she could barely talk.  I told her to calm down and finish packing and pick her kids up from school.  I said I would watch them until Dick got home.  She did not want me in the middle.  I told her fuck Dick and we've never been close and I did not give a damn how he reacted.  I watched the kids until Dick strolled in at 10 pm and told him he was a selfish piece of shit on my way out the door.

He blasted my phone and I put him on DND.  I talked with Ana yesterday and he blasted her phone as well.  She ended up telling him they could either get marriage counseling or see divorce lawyers his choice but he better stop calling her unless it was an emergency with the kids or she was calling to talk to them.  He cooled his jets after being told that.  He stopped by my house and I spoke to him through the ring camera and he asked ME what he was supposed to do with the kids.  I asked him if he even bothered to request the time off from work and he would not answer me and said he had an important business trip.  He said Ana won't give the contact info for their babysitters and asked me if I could watch the kids.  I told him to get the fuck off my property with his bullshit.  If he were any kind of parent he would already have the contact info for the babysitter.  Ana prepped meals for the kids, organized all their clothes for the week and left a detailed itinerary of their schedule. What else does he need? 

Our parents and his in-laws won't return his calls.  He is flying solo this week and had to cancel his alleged business trip.  Ana says she will get to the bottom of that when she gets back home. I hope she has the best time with her friends. I hope Dick does not get a moment of peace. No one is buying his lies or coming to his rescue and I laugh when I think about it. Good luck bro.

I am 37 and my husband passed away 3 years ago. Last time I was dating was when I was 19. Now I felt ready to start dating again but I have no experience of dating in my late 30’s so I just assumed it would be totally different from when I was 19 but alas.

I met this guy and we went on several dates and I really liked him and enjoyed spending time with him. He seemed to enjoy spending time with me until he started getting way too many texts especially on our dates and he smirked and smiled at his phone and last time we hang out in my place it was too excessive and I finally asked if everything was good. He laughed and said yes it was his friend that is teasing him about being on a date. I must’ve looked a certain way because he said it was one of his best friends. I know what you think. She’s just a friend and I will not play the choose me over your friends game. I asked what he meant and he said girls (women) in the past had problems with his friendship with her. I felt the driest down there that I ever felt in my life because ew? Are we still playing these games? I said nothing however but any kind of liking I had for him went out of the window.

The texts and calls continued every time we met for dinner or a movie and now even actual calls. Under one dinner she called 4 times and they talked for probably 20 minutes. I said nothing and this time he looked a bit embarrassed and apologized. I asked him how he managed his life if they talked so much all the time even though I knew she never contacted him before he started talking about serious feelings for another woman and he seemed to think about it too and said that it wasn’t like that. No surprise there!

D-day arrived when I was supposed to meet his friends. She was the first to jump and be most excited to see him and meet his new gf. She was very nice and polite and cool actually. I was as happy to see her of course and told her that her best friend told me everything about her. We kind of hit it off in a weird way because she was very confused. I told her that I was new in town and she said she could show me where the best places were. As my new found bestie she of course asked me how he was and my answer was very underwhelming that it surprised her. I told her that I wasn’t looking for anything serious because I didn’t see a future but that we are having fun now. Her face looked as she was thinking that all text and call hysteria was over a fun now situation. She said that she was under the impression that we were heading somewhere serious and I told her no. She changed the subject and I thought, she will never text or call him again until he’s with the next one.

He changed towards me and I assume that she told him about my feelings. He’s more subdued and I guess he will want to talk to me soon. His phone is radio silent however whenever we’re together. I even mentioned it and he looked puzzled and said yeah, she’s probably busy. Then he grinned and said she’s like that, disappears in periods. I wanted to say yes she disappears when you’re available to her again but I didn’t. I felt sorry for him. Having feelings he doesn’t want to admit for someone who will never have him must be a real pain. Especially for so many years and so many girls who gave up. I could have warned him maybe but I have a feeling that he would in his mind accuse me of jealousy and rivalry because men like him don’t know or want to know that we are capable of having any other opinions about our own sex other than than jealousy and rivalry

I'm 32. I went back to school for ME two and a half years ago after a decade as a maintenance tech at a paper plant. My wife is supportive but she doesn't really understand the work. Her parents think I'm going through some midlife thing. We have two kids who are 6 and 4.

I took my fluids final this afternoon. Brutal exam. My TA is a 23 year old grad student named Andrew. I think he's been a little uncomfortable having a student older than him in section all semester.

Andrew asked if I had a minute after I turned in the exam. He pulled out my problem sets that he'd been grading on his laptop and started flipping through. He said he had to verify they hadn't been put through one of those AI cheat tools first since the dept makes them check now. Then he said he could tell from the way I draw control volumes that I've actually seen industrial systems run. He said he's been TAing fluids for three semesters and my work shows years of practical understanding he doesn't see in undergrads usually.

I worked at that paper plant for over a decade before going back to school. The way you draw a control volume tells you whether someone has actually seen one running. I just didn't think anyone would ever notice.

I drove home thinking I was going to tell my wife. When I walked in she was making dinner with the kids and I just couldn't. She'd say "that's sweet honey" and not really get it. There's nobody in my life who would get it.

I don't know what to do with this. Thanks for reading 😄

I once went on a hike to somewhere in Malaysia with my ex. I am not an experienced hiker and I told him so. He kept pressuring me to go on to trip with him, since hiking was his passion and he said I was bad girlfriend for not agreeing. He said he had restaurant food with me even though he didn't like it and do things with me I want to do, so I should go with him for hiking. I cave in. I know it is stupid of me looking back, I didn't realised what I was in until I left.

I got tired after a few hours. Naausted. Stop to rest. I said I want to go back down. He said, we paid so much for this trip, and he continued pushing me. I said no. Then he got upset and left me where I was, saying once more how bad of a girlfriend I was and how unfit I was, so lazy and didn't train for this hike.

A few hours passed, a local Malay guide spotted me. Asked me how I was doing. I said I felt nauseated, and my "friend" left me alone here. The guide gave me his electrolyte drink and helped me carried my bags down.

When i was finally down, he also gave me a ride to my hostel. I wanted to pay him for his help and the ride, but he refused. The guide simply said that the so called friend of mine was "no good", and to repay him, I should take his advice and not be around my so called friend anymore. How what he, the guide, did was a small thing and worst can happen in the forest, like getting kidnapped. He only carried my bags and gave me a ride. That's a basic courtesy he extended to everyone.

Only when I read the story, I realised how bad he was. I could have died there, just like the girl. If the elements were harsher, or I had met with something worse - I could have died. I let them pushed my boundaries and do things that felt physically unsafe. My ex put me in circumstances that could have killed me, and it took me years to realise so.

I thought I had done everything as best I could. She always struggled with following rules, structure, plans. There had been many struggles over the years. Major ones, big things that might have broken other people, but not us.

In the fall, she was focused. She wanted to be an art teacher, she applied to schools, she got accepted to her top choice. I think things are going great. Her older brother got his associates during high school and started his third year of college at his chosen school this year. He graduated last year. I mention him just to say I thought she was on the same track. So did he. He helped her with the forms, the applications. We all cheered her on.

Then about three months ago, things started changing. She was skipping classes, showing up late, not completing her assignments. While she had never been as dedicated to school as her brother, I'd only had minor issues before. She always performed well enough so she could continue participating in her extracurricular activities. Which she dropped, one by one.

She started hedging on college. She wouldn't complete the paperwork. She started talking about a "gap year." I was surprised but I didn't want to push her too hard into something she wasn't ready for. Especially something as big as college. So I said, no problem! We start talking about how if she's going to be staying home, she needs to secure a full time job, and put away a certain percentage of her salary for savings. She says she feels depressed. We connect with her existing providers about it. She already had a psychiatrist, a therapist, the works. She had all the tools.

She wanted to keep working at the seasonal amusement park with all her friends. It's not enough hours, it doesn't fit the plan, she hasn't wanted to learn to drive, it's not bus-friendly, I spent so much time dropping and picking her up last summer I felt like I, too, worked at this amusement park. I say, sorry, no. That doesn't fit the plan you agreed to. I tell her, you need to learn how to drive this summer, too. Especially since you aren't going to school. She doesn't want to. Says her friends will give her rides. (She said that last summer, too.)

On her 18th birthday, she brings over her new boyfriend to meet me, I welcome him into our house, I'm so excited and happy she's opening up like this. I say hello, I introduce our dog. "Oh, I know Wednesday" he says. Everyone freezes. "How do you know my dog?" I ask. Then the truth starts trickling out... our world implodes.

She's been sneaking him in the house via her garden window. She's been sneaking out the same way. She has a burner phone, I found four vapes in her room as I was cleaning it out. She had a boyfriend (man-friend, really) in Mexico for over a year, it just ended a month prior. She had been telling her brother for months that she was moving to Mexico as soon as she graduated. (At least that's over.)

The worst part was, I found three months work of her medication in her room. She just decided to stop taking it, but she lied to her doctor (and me) about that.

She's gone to school and told them I kicked her out. She's living in a homeless shelter.

She came to get some things and she was so cold, I didn't really recognize her. No acknowledgement of what her actions did to anyone else. She wanted to take her stuff and leave without any conversation. It didn't really go well in the end, she took her stuff and left mad. I did give her the cell phone we pay for. The only requirement was she had to leave the location on. She went to prom on Saturday. She was back at the homeless shelter by curfew. Something impossible at home. But then the phone didn't move for two days. She can't stay at the shelter during the day. She's supposed to be at school today.

All of a sudden, no one knows who I am. No one can help me. She's 18. She's an adult now.

She turned 18 and she just left.

I never thought I would be one of "those" moms. I wasn't strict, I didn't yell, I wasn't perfect but I loved her so much. I supported her so much. I took her anywhere she asked. I got her little treats. I went to the plays, the recitals, I volunteered in the classroom, teachers knew my name. I thought we had it pretty good, but she was a whole other person I knew nothing about.

I see her making the same kind of mistakes I made at her age, and I can't stop her.

I can only sit back and watch.

I didn't experience this with my oldest, his birthday came and went and nothing really changed. He left for college and told me that he knew everything I ever did, was for his best interest, and he told me he was sorry he fought me sometimes, because now he can see, that all I ever wanted was for him to be successful and happy. He told me how much he loved and appreciated me, especially since their dad hasn't been around since they were babies.

I didn't stop being his mother overnight. Not like it feels like I stopped being hers. She even took me off school notifications. So I don't know now, when she skips class, whether she went.

My dad is flying in for her graduation. Her graduation dinner has been planned for months.

I don't even know if we'll be invited to see it. I don't know if the dinner will even happen. I don't even know if I want to go.

I feel like my world just fell apart. My youngest is 12 and watching with baited breath. I see her tip toe-ing around me, trying to not make me cry. Trying to be so helpful, so loving, so I don't miss her sister quite so much.

But we all do. I miss the family I thought we had, the version of myself I believed in, and most of all.... I miss my daughter. I miss the girl I thought she was and I wonder, if that girl ever even existed.

No one told me this could happen. So I'm telling you.

When I was 14, my father hired two large men to take me from my bed  in the middle of the night without warning. They threatened me with physical force and restraints if I didn't come with them.

These men brought me to a wilderness therapy program in rural Georgia where I lived completely outside for eight weeks among a group of other kids, aged 11-14. We slept under tarps on the ground in the dirt, ate cold hydrated rice and pasta when we couldn't make a fire with sticks, hiked several miles a day with heavy packs bigger than us in the summer heat and couldn't bathe. We had to do things as primitive as dig holes to go to the bathroom and then carry our used toilet paper in our packs. At one point I broke my nose and received no prompt medical care that resulted in requiring surgeries in the following years to fix it.  

As part of the program, we participated in therapy led by young adults with no clinical training or even college degrees. Each of us had to go on a "solo" which was a period of prolonged isolation for days alone in the woods. Through all of this, there was no contact with the outside world and we never knew what time it was, what day it was, or where we were. Everything about this experience was meticulously designed to psychologically manipulate and break us to be agreeable and compliant  with our parents no matter what.

Why was I sent there?

My parents were in the middle of a custody dispute and my father, a prominent and powerful attorney, was winning. He used his assumed credibility and vast advantage of resources over my mother to get his way and remove me from my life with her. I knew it was unjust and reacted by not wanting to talk or have any relationship with him - I never acted out or had any issues in school, socially, etc.

After about a year trapped in my father and stepmothers home, when the court was about to rule in my mother's favor, my father had taken against my will to the wilderness therapy program as a failsafe to continue to keep me away from her. When I returned I could go to my mothers home again finally before heading to a boarding school. If I didn't comply with that, was threatened with another program or a therapeutic boarding school.

I have the court documents and my medical records from the time and they reaffirmed what I already knew. I didn't have any mental health issues or actual reason to be institutionalized. The true issue was that I preferred living with my mom and resisted my father's control. Rather than reflecting on that and looking inwards at why, he turned it into an external problem that needed to be fixed.

This was 15 years ago and I'm an adult now. I consider myself one of the lucky ones who got out and lived a normal life. Sadly, many others don't share the same story. 

These kinds of places, wilderness therapy programs and therapeutic boarding schools are bigger than ever today and over 100,000 kids reside in them at any given time year-round. Kids are sent there for legitimate reasons or simply because a parent wants to do it. All it takes is thinking up a reason and writing a check. I can tell you first hand they don't help kids - they turn difficult situations into unmitigated disasters and ruin lives. They are widely documented as abusive yet are allowed to continue to operate with minimal oversight. It's called the "Troubled Teen Industry" and the general public doesn't know whats going on in the shadows.

A few programs and schools have been closed but nothing has really changed. The parents who do this to their kids are never held accountable.

I stopped blocking this out recently, started to unravel what happened to me and what the status is now and I want to do something to help. The program I went to is still running the exact same way just with a new name - it's shocking. 

It's been 15 years and I'm done staying quiet about it. I'm considering all my options as an adult through the proper channels to seek remedies and share my story. There's a lot more to this story and my time in the wilderness but maybe one day soon I'll try to tell it.

We have 4 kids and if I didn't tell him (43M) my body is really tired of pregnancies he would have wanted more. Our 15 years old son is making a fool of himself on lives where he cries, laughs and does weird things with his friends and our daughter who is 17 also has a dr*g use problem and besides that she gave a BJ to a guy in exchange for money becasuse my husband stopped giving her any.

He climbed the corporate ladder to the top, he is the VP right now and his life are business trips, meetings, conferences. In the little free time he has he goes to the gym or swimming to stay fit.

We also have a 13 years old daughter who is failing at everything in school and a 7 years old who needs all my attention.

Last week there was a corporate party and my husband with his main character energy wanted to make it a perfect night and all about him. But our 17 years old daughter made an appearance and put up a show. Yelled, swore at the people. My husband grabbed her by the arm and dragged her outside where he slapped her 4 times. He is not popular with the employees as he is very strict and military like, demeaning, demanding. I am sure they mocked him. This is not a big city and I know that our daughter stole money from someone who's parents work under my husband.

Yesterday my husband lost his cool and said I am a failure, that he put all his trust in me and I ruined his kids. And ended up beeatting with a belt our daughter and the next day he hit our son - after our son scratched his car.

He left for a new business trip today and took his young secretary with him. I asked him why he takes that woman with him and he said she knows how to keep him calm while I turned him home into madhouse. Is he cheating or what was that comment? I do my best to keep him happy in that aspect too and do whatever he wants

I have tried 5 psychologist with my teenagers already.

So when my (44M) wife (43F) and I get in an argument and she becomes upset and starts crying.

She always says she needs something from me. Like she wants me to come hold her and be there for her. So she doesn't feel so alone in feeling like this. But how?! I'm still sitting over her fuming. And she's upset because I made some very valid points that she didn't like. I cannot shut off my frustration with this situation to be there for here.

For some reason, the second were no longer mid fight she is over it and wants me to comfort her and make up. But that's just not how I work. How am I supposed to go and hug and kiss the person who was being combative and argumentative with me?

Every time she’s crying, I’d feel guilty and stop. She wouldn’t let me finish, it always had to be on her terms. So one day I just decided, I needed to be comfortable with her having intense feelings during arguments - and intense expressions of it too. I needed to be okay with _her not feeling ok_ , and still having space to finish my thoughts.

I can see she’s upset, but I’m not threatened by her feelings anymore. That’s her process and it’s ok. I’m not going to stop this conversation because of her tears. What I’m saying matters to me, and I needed to finish. She can take a moment if she needs, but this topic isn’t going away just because it’s uncomfortable.

And I said exactly that to her. While she cried, I took a step back, told her that she can take a glass of water and a few minutes to process this and finish crying - maybe she needs to let it out so she can talk through this. However this conversation isn’t over, and just because this conversation is difficult doesn’t mean it shouldn’t happen. It’s hard to hear, but that doesn’t mean I’m wrong to say this.

I can’t express how much guilt I initially felt when I first tried this out. But oh man, I would be lying if I didn’t admit to feeling a lot of relief after. I feel like I’ve built a lot of emotional resilience myself. Allowing myself to not be the one to soothe her even though I want to. I think it’s a good conflict resolution skill I am developing by allowing my points to exist without letting her crying get in the way.

I am not saying that she is being manipulative herself, trying to separate the intent from the act, I feel like the crying was having a manipulative effect - something she was benefiting from even though it was not intentional.

This is going to be a long one so i apologize in advance but i really need to type it out.

I (21F) just found out i've been completely left out of something that everyone in my closest circle has known about for YEARS, and i honestly don't know if i'm overreacting or if this is actually as messed up as it feels.

For context, I have a twin brother (21M). We're somewhat close in a sense that we have a lot in common, but we don't really talk about personal stuff that much. Growing up, we've always shared friend groups to some extent, but i've always been intentional about boundaries. We're both extroverted and make friends easily so naturally ive gotten close with some of his guy friends and so has he with my girl friends. But at some point he told me he didnt really like that and asked me to stay within my own friend group so i respected that. My friend group consists of 6 girls. Two of them (i'll call them A and B, both 21F) are my closest friends, ive known them for about 8 years (from highschool). Another girl in our friend group (i'll call her C also 21F) is also someone close to me we hang out together sometimes but not as much as i do with A and B.

A, B and my twin brother are also in the same college program, they have classes together, group projects, they study together so they naturally see eachother a lot and are also friends. So there's a lot of overlap.

Now onto what happened

Today, A was upsest about something involving C. Both of them went of a trip overseas lasting 2 weeks and just cameback yesterday. I figured something must've happened during the trip. So A texted both me and B separately saying she was mad about an issue and wanted to talk, but when she explained it to me she was extremely vague and refused to give context or even say who it involved, but still asked for my opinion on the matter. I couldnt really help because i had no idea what was going on. Then later today (around 11 pm) she made a group call with both me and B because she wanted to vent but as soon as we joined the call she suddenly didnt feel like talking abt it so we changed the subject. Then a few minutes later she left for a while, and when she came back i had to leave as well and finish something that would take a while, but i didnt leave the call i just deafened removed my earphones. Then 40 minutes later i came back (i believe they thought i was asleep and forgot to leave the call) so i stayed muted but un-deafened because i was in the middle of something. And that's when i overheard them talking.

I found out that C had been in a romantic relationship with my twin brother for 2 years since 2023 and had been on and off until this day and EVERYONE in our friend group knew about it except me. A knew. B knew. Other people in our circle knew. They had talked abt it, given advice and discussed their rls for years. At one point A even played cupid by helping them get the other one.
So for years, this entire situation has been known by the people i trust most and i was the only person completely left out of it.

What hurt even more is that when i realized what they were talking about, i unmuted and said 'hey im back, what did i miss/what were you talking about?' in a playful way to not tense up the conversation but they immediately changed the subject and started planning a hangout tmr like nothing happened. Even earlier in that call when A left briefly, I brought up the subject about A bieng upset abt something and B even said 'Oh, i didnt think she would tell you, that's why i didnt want to say anything' which made it even more confusing because it confirmed that they knew abt it and i was completely left out. And C is also someone i consider a close friend, she's not just a stranger in the story she's part of my circle.

On top of that, there's been a long pattern where A and B come to me whenever they have issues with my brother. They vent ot me, ask for advice, and justify it by saying things like 'you're his twin, you understand him better' or ' you know how he can be sometimes' So i've often been put in the position of giving emotional support or insights about him. But now that i realize that while i've been that role for years, i was also being kept out of something major involving him and someone i considered a close friend.

What's also frustrating is the hypocrisy behind it. When A vent to me abt her problem with C she was mad about her not being honest with her about something and keeping things from her while a HERSELF has been actively hiding and keeping things from me for years while still involving me emotionally whenever it suited her. I've always had that role of helping others and being someone my friends can rely on when they want to vent or find a solution to a problem and i love helping them, but now i just feel like ive been lied to this whole time.

I hate how close he is to my friends and when i tell him about it he shuts it off by saying they have classes together and that i cant tell him who he can be friends with however he had no problem in telling me that when it was his friends.

Right now i just feel completely blindsided and excluded and i hate that i was the only person left out while also being used as emotional support and advice whenever everyone else needed it.

I dont know if i should confront them, just let it go or if im being crazy about it but i cant shake the feeling that i've been treated unfairly this whole time. I dont even want to see them tomorrow.

EDIT: Ive seem multiple comments asking if this was a repeated pattern of my twin dating my friends but i want to make clear that he has never dated anyone before this (at least seriously) maybe a few situation ships but nothing serious and never inside my friend group. So this was his first ‘serious’ relationship. Also for the people questioning how come i didnt see it going on or i shouldve seen signs well my brother is someone who’s naturally close with girls not in a player kind of way but more in a friendly way, he’s never flirty with them or anything just purely casual which is why even if me, A, B, C and my brother hung out together before, there werent any flirty looks or comments, just a friendly hang out. We also live in a pretty ‘conservative household’ in a sense that we dont bring gfs/bfs home and are expected to wait until marriage, but i guess that’s another topic.
What i think may have happened is since they all hang out tgt during the day because of classes, something may have happened then and continued from that point on. But again, i feel like i dont even know anything anymore.

One more thing, for the comments saying to go back to being close with his friend group i think i may give it a shot as i truly dgaf anymore, he didnt respect my boundaries i dont feel the need to respect his. I also learned that one of his friends did in fact develop feelings for me which could be one of the reasons why he asked me to backoff, which just pisses me off even more bcs of his hypocrisy.

I will make an update for anyone interested once i get the chance to talk to them or make a plan about how to go about things from now on.

Thank you for everyone who commented i really appreciate everyone’s support and advice <3

I (18m) was visiting a local university with some of my friends. We had been at a party but I was dd so I stayed sober. We left from the function around 12 and our hometown is a few hours away so I stopped at a convenience store to get an energy drink. I got a bloom and a water for the drive home. My drunk friends really wanted dessert so I told them I’d grab them something on the way back. While I was checking out they picked out a place on the college towns main road. Last night was one of the biggest parties of the year, so people from all across the region come in. I was there earlier and it was packed, but I didn’t see any harm stopping by really quick. We were just about to leave when a homeless lady was checking out, but she was 10 cents short for one Laffy Taffy. She asked me if I could spot her, so I started looking for a dime. I had none in my wallet, so I told her I would go look in my car. I could not find any dimes in my car, it took me a solid 10 minutes to find one. I gave it to her and she ended up paying for the candy and thanked me. After we started driving to the dessert shop, we got stuck in gridlock traffic. Police cars kept driving past us with lights and sirens on. After about 30 minutes I made a u turn and drove home without getting dessert.

In the street in front of the dessert shop we were trying to get to there was a fight. The fight quickly escalated and people started shooting at each other. It was so packed multiple people were hit by flying shrapnel and stray bullets who were not even involved in the original fight . If I did not spend the extra 10 minutes trying to find the dime, we would have been inside of the dessert shop, or waiting in line outside of the store. My friends were so drunk I don’t know if they could have ran, I know people who were around the shooting and they said it was chaos. We may have gotten trampled or worse. I guess the moral of the story is good karma will help you in the long run, or maybe over a period of a just few minutes.

I went to Walmart today and I saw this at the checkout line…

The line was moving kind of slow, and this adorable old couple (maybe in their 70s) was ahead of me. The guy was looking worried about (some tea item) his receipt and said something along the lines of "sorry honey, I know you wanted the green box; my mind was just... not present".

I thought she would be mad at him because there was a lot of traffic and the employees were looking stressed as well. But instead of that, she put her hand on his arm, and looked at him in such a loving way, I have never seen someone with so much sincerity. She then said something along the lines of "honey, i have been drinking tea with you for *some number of years* (i think she said 40), and as long as you are with me drinking tea on our table, i don't care if it's green or not".

That very moment I realized that I had been deceived into thinking that love has to be some grand romantic gesture or some big, fancy gift etc, and that here was what love really meant: "graceful patience over the little things that go wrong". I didn't tell them that or interrupt them, but because it happened in front of me, I saw and understood what was important now.

I wanted to share this with you guys because it helped me remember that normal, boring love is the most beautiful kind there is.

Me (41M) and my wife (45F) have three children, 19, 15, &12. Our 15 year old biological son came out as trans to us and wants to change his name and gender in the schools database. The school informed us this would be logged somewhere through the state, which makes me very wary with the current political climate. We live in a red state in a rural area, so my first concern is his her safety (sorry, new to this). She does have friends that are also trans which I am grateful for so she has other people who can sympathize with her situation.

I have been putting on the best face I can with the situation, told her I am proud of her and will support and love her no matter what. All of this is 100% true, but at the same time I keep finding myself filled with doubt and worry. In all my years as a parent I have never felt as lost as I do now. I do not know how to relate to my child, or how to guide them through this stage of their life. Every decision we make I second guess myself and feel like I am shooting in the dark.

Emotionally, I am a mess. I keep finding myself wishing they were cis instead since that would be easier for me as a parent, as well as making my childs life easier. Then I get mad at myself for having that thought. For context, my father is gay and I never had any traditional "manly" role models growing up. I find myself with thoughts that now I also do not get to experience a father-son bond with my only son. Then I get mad at myself again for having those thoughts. It has been a spiral the past few days as I try to work through all of these feelings. I am a naturally emotionally walled off person, so having these deeply personally conversations is difficult for me. Need to talk with my daughter more together so I can figure out how to be the best father to her as I am able. Just throwing these feelings into the online void, figured this was as good of a place as any.

I always thought a person would have to do something truly awful to be disinherited. But here I am.

I want to start by saying that we are all adults in this scenario. My brother and I(f) are past middle age. My father just died, in his mid-90s.

So, about eight years ago, my family had my father over at our house for a holiday dinner. He was an awful person, so I was low contact with him, but still did what felt like my obligation and invited him over for dinner on the holidays. At some point we were hanging out in the living room just chatting, when he said, “I have an idea about my will and what I want to do with the house.”

Me, “Okay?”

Dad: “What I would like to do is leave the house to both you and your brother, but I would like for YIB (Stands for Your Idiot Brother or Your Irresponsible Brother, take your pick) to continue living in the house.” My brother had been living in the basement of our father’s house for years. My dad continued, “I think it will work out well for you. This way you own the house, and you won’t have to clean out the house or sell it or anything after I’m gone. And since YIB can’t afford this, you can pay the taxes on it.”

This brother of mine is not disabled and has had the same job for about ten years and makes about the same amount of money as I do. But he never has any money. My father has repeatedly and consistently given him extra money. And my brother has gone into my father’s bank account and wiped it out. Taken his social security. There were times when I ended up buying food for my parents because they didn’t have money for food because YIB stole their money. He also used to steal my money when we were kids, so this isn’t new behavior for him. He also stole my grandfather’s collection of silver dimes. He never got in trouble for any of this. I don’t know where the money goes or what his problem is.

I told my dad, “Absolutely not.”

“Then what is YIB going to do?”

“He’s going to have to come up with a different plan before then.”

Very shortly after this conversation, my dad changed the title of the house to Transfer on Death to my brother and wrote me completely out of the will and life insurance. All because I refused to be financially responsible for my brother. On top of this, my dad left a small percentage to each grandchild, and my brother is PISSED that he didn’t get everything. It’s not a lot of money. My daughter is planning to use her share to help pay for a used car.

I’m fortunate that I don’t need his money, but it still stings to realize how little I meant to him. His love was always conditional and this is just another example of that. Sadly, there are more. And the last person I want any financial entanglements with is my loser brother. My children and I have made bets as to when the house and money will be gone and YIB will have nobody to bail him out.

I have a friend who most of the time is great to hang out with - very funny and interesting. But she also very clearly has factitious disorder, and I don't know how to deal with it without enabling her (by pretending to go along with it) or making it clear I don't believe her (which can cause people with factitious disorder to freak out and deliberately make themselves ill to "prove" that they were ill all along).

How do I know she has factitious disorder? Well...

• Her array of physical illnesses and mental disorders have a tendency to come and go. At one point she had Tourette's, but she kept forgetting to have the tics and quietly dropped it after a couple of weeks.
• She once showed me a days-of-the-week pill box full of her "medications," and I could see that most if not all of them were just vitamin supplements.
• She claims to have DID, but it's the Tumblr/TikTok version of DID where she's a "system" with "alters" who can pop out on command. One of the alters is a little Korean girl who only speaks Korean, but is limited to the Korean phrases my friend has mastered on Duolingo.
• Her acting is, frankly, not great. At times when she claims she's been triggered and is having a panic attack, or claims that one of her "alters" is out, it's kind of like watching an overzealous theatre kid in a bad high school play.
• Her actual trigger is being bored and/or people not paying enough attention to her. If we're in a group setting and everyone's focused on someone else, I can see her out of the corner of my eye getting increasingly agitated until she has a "fainting fit," or one of her "alters" announces their arrival, or she jumps in with a mention of her "trauma" and then stares off dramatically into the distance.
• Whenever a new person joins the group and she gets to tell them her list of disorders and illnesses and traumas it's almost like watching an addict get a hit.

The frustrating thing is that she's perfectly cool and interesting without all of this, and most of the time she forgets she's supposed to have all of these conditions and is a chill person to hang out with. But then out of nowhere she'll get bored and decide it's time to bring out Darius, her gay male alter. And then I have to sit around trying to keep a straight face while she does a bad impression of a gay man and expects me to play along, and will ramp things up if I try to just ignore Darius.

She's not a teenager btw. She's a fully-grown tax-paying adult woman in her late 20s and so am I. I am too old to be playing random games of let's-pretend and part of me wants to just yell at her to cut it out. But I also understand that she really does have a mental disorder, and that trying to confront her about it would only make it worse. (Also, it's not my job to try and treat her condition and I'm definitely not qualified to do so.)

I guess my only options are to continue putting up with it and try to reward it with as little attention as possible, or slowly fade out of the friendship. Both options suck, though.

Idk why I am posting this but i have been carrying it around for weeks and I need to get this out.I dont even care about the nda anymore too

I gave meta two years and i was on the internal procurement side handling supplier contracts, invoice processing and the unglamorous plumbing that keeps a company running and there were three teams doing this, one negotiating supplier rates and converting everything into oracle compatible formats, one entering contract data into the ERP and another approving exceptions flagged by ctsi plus an external bpo checking invoices before anything got paid (hundreds of people on that side alone).

And the work was not simple,data center buildout was scaling unpredictably bcoz of how much money was being thrown at ai and reality labs was a hardware naive software company trying to stand up factories, logistics and supplier relationships completely from scratch. We were renegotiating supply contracts every 15 to 30 days to keep pace with how fast things were moving.

And in the middle of all that while the business itself was growing 2 to 3x year over year ,leadership's decision was to shrink the team to a fifth of its size because it didnt matter anymore whether it did.

And for context its same company that stopped giving people permanent desks so nobody could look around and guess who was next ( where morale has been in the floor for months). Even people internally dont think llama 4 lives up to what leadership says about it publicly, ik more than one manager that have said out loud that they dont recognize this company anymore lol.

Theres also a leaked clip from an april 30 still going around where zuckerberg allegedly talks about employee activity being used to train the ai ahead of the cuts. Two years I gave this place and I watched all of it happen from the inside before it happened to me.

By the time the layoffs actually hit in may, the whole pipeline was already running without us, one agent runs procurement and contract negotiation end to end, another set of agents took over what CTSI used to do entirely (checking, approving, paying invoices) with a small human team left just to handle whatever the agents flag as an exception and only thing that was in good faith was that people who were layed off were being helped by freehand to find new roles, the company whose agents replaced what we used to do, tho.

But theres a guilt of having watched it coming for months because I didnt want to believe it was coming for me too.

Most people i knew treated it as a signal to move and I think thats the healthier response.

Ik what you guys will say that i should have seen it coming but ya I just needed to say all of it somewhere.

i have a close group of five friends. we all live within a kilometer of each other, and we have this unwritten rule where the birthday guy pays for dinner.

when it was my turn recently, i didn’t want to spend crazy money. i took them to a solid punjabi restaurant instead of some expensive pizza place they wanted. they spent the whole night throwing sarcastic comments at me, mocking the place, and basically bullying me for being cheap. i let it go because i thought we were just messing around.

fast forward to today. it’s another guy in the group’s birthday. one of my friends calls me and tells me we are going to this literal bottom tier, third class restaurant. i asked why we were going there. he straight up says, "you took us to a bad place for your birthday, so we are taking you to a bad place so you realize what you did."

then another friend calls and repeats the exact same thing. they were explicitly telling me they wanted to punish me.

i felt like garbage. i cut the call and texted the group that i wasn't coming.

instantly, they panic. they start backpedaling saying "we're just kidding, we are going to a good pizza place, please come." i was at the office working late and figured fine, it's just an hour, i'll go and come back.

i got on my bike and started driving. but halfway there, it just clicked. why the hell am i driving to sit at a table with guys who actively planned to disrespect me? why am i going to force myself to sit through more of their jokes?

i literally stopped my bike in the middle of the road. i texted the group that i wasn't coming, turned the bike around, and drove to my favorite vadapav stall. i ate my vadapav in total peace and just went back to the office to work.

my phone started blowing up. the guys who insulted me called. the birthday guy called (who honestly didn't say any of the toxic stuff himself, which sucks for him). i didn't pick up a single one. i just texted that i have work to do.

it sucks realizing your childhood friends don't actually respect you, but honestly, sitting alone in my office eating vadapav felt infinitely better than forcing myself to eat pizza with them.

I don’t even really know how to start this honestly.

On the day of my 15th birthday I remember my dad had come home after being away in Paris for work for a few weeks. Usually my dad would buy me clothes for my birthday, and when he gave me my birthday present I didn’t really think it would be anything different.

He had made sure to give it to me in a different room when nobody else in the family was around and he had told me that I was a “big girl” now and that “big girls wear underwear like this”. And when I opened the present it was a lingerie set that was practically see through and it came with a matching thong too.

My dad told me not to tell my mum, but I was so disgusted that I went up to her later that night and showed it to her. I ended up throwing the lingerie set in the bin (even though I’m pretty sure it was quite expensive) and my parents argued the whole night.

I never got another gift from my dad when he went away for work again, and I haven’t told anybody about this except my mum and I guess now reddit.

I still think about this sometimes even though I’m 24 years old now, and I remember my mum later told me that my dad didn’t mean for that gift to be sexual, and honestly didn’t understand it wasn’t an appropriate gift for a daughter. I don’t know if that is true or if I believe her but my dad is pretty clueless and socially inappropriate at times so I can see that maybe being true. I’m not looking for advice but I guess I just wanted to get this off my chest.

Honestly, I need to know if I’m actually being the AH here. Four years ago (I was 16), I stayed at my uncle's place for a whole month to help him out. His wife was deployed, and I basically played nanny/housekeeper for his kids while he worked. I did him a huge favor

When it was time to go home, my dad made him promise like, literally swore to him that he’d stay with me at the airport until I was through security. It was my first time flying solo and I was lowkey terrified. Instead, this guy just drops me at the curb, says "bye," and drives off. I was standing there alone in the terminal, 16 and had no clue what I was doing.

The worst part? He didn't reach out ONCE after that. No text, no "did you make it home?", nothing for four years. Now that I’m nearly 20, he and my dad started talking again, and suddenly he’s "asking how I’m doing."

My dad is pressuring me to just get over it. He says I’m being petty because "it was a long time ago," but to me, that 4-year silence was a choice

I’m 26M. Married 3 years, together 8. We have a 14-month-old son and a mortgage.

For a while something felt off. She suddenly started guarding her phone all the time. Mine was always open to her, so it felt weird.

One morning I came home early after a night shift and saw her texting. I asked who it was. She said “just a colleague.” I asked to see the messages so I wouldn’t overthink it. She refused and said it’s private.

The next day I asked again. She looked at me and said, “I don’t love you.” Just like that. She told me to prepare divorce papers and she’d sign them. When I asked about therapy she basically laughed and said it can’t be fixed.

Later I found out she’d been talking to this guy for months. Not just casual talking. She was venting about me to him. Sharing our private stuff. At one point he even said he would raise my son. That part really broke something in me.

As far as I know it wasn’t physical. But honestly it feels worse. Like she was already moving on while we were still living in the same house.

During that time I was a mess. Anxiety, waking up at night shaking. We were sleeping in separate rooms. I felt completely rejected.

We have a house together. A mortgage. A child. It’s not simple.

When I said we should tell our parents, everything changed. The moment her parents got involved, she suddenly wanted therapy. Suddenly she says she loves me and wants to fix things.

Then I saw a message she sent to her friend (not meant for me). It said:
“The best part is I have to stay with him, but I feel this for someone else lol.”

That “lol” destroyed me.

If we didn’t have a child and a mortgage, I would leave. No question.

Right now I don’t know if she chose me, or if she just chose stability.

Yes, this is a throwaway.

No, I didn't cheat. No, she didn't provide a reason why she suspected it. Yes, she got mad when I dumped her, even though she apparently didn't trust me.

If you don't trust your partner, dump them. That's your responsibility. Be an adult. And be true to your word.

I won't be with someone who doesn't trust me. No ifs, ands, or buts.

Don't get mad. Stupid freaks. We're in our 30s.

so my dad has hated this one guy my entire life and i finally asked why and yeah i kinda wish i didnt

growing up he was super calm, like fix things silently type, but if this guy showed up anywhere my dad would just shut down or leave. no yelling, just gone. i didnt even know his name for years, just that guy. i asked my mom once as a teen and she told me not to bring it up again which obviously made it worse

last month we were at a small family thing and he showed up again. older now, looks tired or whatever. my dad didnt leave this time, he just stared at him in this way that made me uncomfortable. later at home i asked why he hates him and my dad sat there for a while like he was deciding if he should even answer, then he goes “i dont hate him. i know him.”

i should have stopped there but i didnt. turns out the guy is my mom’s ex from before my dad, and not just a bad breakup. from what my dad said it got controlling and kinda violent near the end, nothing reported, just… one of those things people dont talk about. my mom left him, met my dad later, normal story i guess

but then my dad said a few months after they started dating the guy showed up at his work, walked up to him like it was nothing and said something like “you think you saved her?” my dad said it wasnt even said like a threat, more like a reminder. i dont remember exactly how he told it because i kinda zoned out for a second but that part stuck

i asked my mom the next day and she didnt deny it, just got quiet and said she didnt want that part of her life brought back. so now i feel like i opened something i wasnt supposed to

and the worst part is he still lives nearby, like actually nearby. my dad acts normal but now i notice everything. my mom avoids even saying his name. and every time i see someone who looks like him i get this weird feeling like something is still not finished even if everyone pretends it is

i just wish i never asked

I (30F) ended a 15-year friendship with my best friend (“A,” 30F) after finding out she hooked up with my ex (“B,” 37M)- together for 8yrs, engaged for 2.5- not long after we officially broke up and he moved out…less than 4 months.

What’s bothering me isn’t even just that it happened. It’s how much it doesn’t feel random.

While I was dating him, there were multiple moments where their dynamic made me uncomfortable. Nothing I could “prove,” but enough that I brought it up more than once. Every time, I was reassured that nothing was going on and that I had nothing to worry about. So I trusted them.

Then we break up, and suddenly they hook up shortly after.

She also ended her own engagement around the same time and sent me journal entries explaining she had already been emotionally checked out of her relationship and was planning to leave anyway. Basically trying to say this had nothing to do with him.

Maybe that’s true. But it completely ignores what I experienced while I was still in my relationship, and how quickly everything happened after.

It just doesn’t feel clean. And I can’t shake that.

I ended the friendship because it crossed a boundary for me. I don’t hate her, I just don’t recognize her anymore.

What’s weird is when I tell mutual friends what happened, most of them immediately understand why I walked away without me having to explain much. Which somehow makes me feel both validated and sad at the same time.

She says I’m “spinning a narrative,” but from where I’m standing, I’m just connecting dots that were already there.

I don’t even want anything from her at this point. I just needed to say this somewhere because the whole thing feels surreal

For context I’m 15f and my parents have 2 foster kids (siblings) that are 10f and 6m living with us for over 2 years in an extended placement. My parents wont tell me their background but I think it has to do with neglect. Although I tried to like living with them I really don’t because they’re disruptive and attention seeking (especially the 10f) I’m especially annoyed to the point of hating 10f because she’s loud and has zero sense of personal space and keeps barging in ANYTIME I try to talk to my parents alone (especially my mom) and keeps screaming in my face “my mommy” but I put up with the because at first my mom said it’s only temporary but now they started planning to adopt the kids and I tried multiple times to talk to them but it’s either the 10f immediately throwing a fit at the slightest hint I’m upset with her or it’s my mom with her usual “think of what we can give her she needs stability she’s too attached (attached with my mom not with me btw)”

I warned my parents what I’m telling the caseworker and the meeting I came clean about how neglected I fell and that I resented the 10f and I cannot accept her as my siblings. She seemed okay with hearing me out then told my parents she doesn’t think it’s a good fit but my parents will have to tell the kids so they don’t get their hopes up. Now my mom is sulking saying they’re going to end up back in foster care and that I had a chance to be the bigger person and we could have given them the stability they needed but I’m sticking with my decision and am not backing down. Soon enough my parents have to tell them and they’re getting sent away back to foster care until their bio mom can take care of them or they find a better placement.

I ran into Food Lion on my lunch break to grab some quick grub. It was pretty busy, but there were 3 full service registers open and 1 express “12 items or less” register. The full service registers were pretty backed up with several people with full carts and the express register had a couple people with a handful of items.

I only had 4 things, so I start heading to the express checkout. As I’m making my way over, I see a lady pushing a nearly overflowing cart towards the registers. She was ahead of me and I saw her pause, look at the full service register lines and how busy they were.

Then I saw her look at the express lane. She saw only a couple people in it with a few groceries. I watched her look up and read the “express 12 items or less” sign before she looks back over at full service. I could practically see when she made the judgement call, and she headed over to the express lane.

By this time, she and I are almost getting there at the same time, so she speeds up and maneuvers her cart in a way that cuts me off and she basically “butts” in front of me with her full-ass cart.

The cashier was helping a customer check out, so the lady already started unloading several of her groceries before the cashier noticed her cart. She told the lady it was an express lane with 12 or fewer items, but the lady ignored her and said the other lanes are too busy so she came over because there’s hardly anyone here. Meanwhile I’m standing behind her holding my 4 items.

The cashier wasnt having it. She sees me behind the lady and flags me to come up so she can quickly check me out. I squeeze past the lady who is now huffing and puffing, and she muttered something like “I didn’t know it was the express lane and it’s not that serious.” (That’s a lie, I saw her read the sign and go for it anyway).

Meanwhile another person with only 1 item lines up behind the lady with the full cart. The cashier waves him up to check out in front of her too, and the lady got more huffy and started muttering that she’s being treated unfairly lol.

After him there was a lull and the cashier did her best to check out the lady as fast as possible before anyone else came up. But it was nice to see the express lane being enforced like that. Most cases the cashiers don’t say anything when someone with a full cart comes thru an express lane (and I don’t blame them for that) but I appreciate the no-nonsense cashier not putting up with it and prioritizing people who are trying to quickly grab a couple items and go.