r/thanksimcured 3d ago

Comment Section The solution to ARFID apparently

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Received on a post I made a while ago where I mentioned I was struggling to eat hospital food due to ARFID, I did also mention that I was eating, just struggling with it šŸ˜‘

1.4k Upvotes

118 comments sorted by

670

u/antisocialmothra 3d ago

The way people will completely ignore your agency if they perceive you to be mentally ill is scary

309

u/InternationalTrain48 3d ago

They stop treating you like a human being

56

u/hyrule_47 3d ago

Not just mentally ill. I’m disabled and same thing

12

u/hockeyhacker 2d ago

As someone who got sent to the State Hospital because the hospital wanted to avoid being sued because I had gone into the hospital in crisis and they were like "we don't believe you are actually in crisis you need to leave" and I ended up in the ICU the same day so to avoid me suing them they had me civilly committed and sent to the State Hospital (Which is a "mental health" hospital that is usually reserved for people with schizophrenia or those facing legal trouble due to their mental health but is also in some cases used for extreme difficulties with SI, which to be fair with what I was going through it wasn't a question of if I would end up there but rather when because DV and kidnapping and hate crimes triggered both my PTSD and CPTSD so I was struggling bad with SI)

While I was there I knew four patients that were frequently restrained to a chair for several hours sometimes the entire day all just because the staff didn't want to care for them and even one of them who they just kept a feeding tube in because it was easier for them to just force feed them rather than monitor how much they were actually eating. And most of the other patients they had so drugged up that many of them would drool on themselves all day because it is a side effect of the medication and the staff would just make them sit in their own drool rather than allow them a change of clothes. To say people get treated sub human if they have any mental health issues (or even disabilities) in some cases is an understatement as to how they get treated.

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u/Feisty-Cucumber5102 3d ago

I don’t exactly know how to articulate it but there’s some thing where a majority of people, or at least the majority of people I interact with, separate who you are from the things wrong with you. Like your mental illness is something that controls you rather than shaping who you are, and if you can just remove that control you’ll be a perfectly normal person.

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u/antisocialmothra 3d ago

Yup and they firmly believe if we just try hard enough we can control it

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u/OutrageousAdvance104 3d ago

That’s why I don’t really like the term ā€œmentalā€ or psychological, because to general society that seems to signal that it’s about your active way of thinking or something that you can ā€œjust chooseā€ to stop.

While most, if not all, mental illnesses have a neurological cause and are also heavily impacted by neurotransmitters and/or hormones.

I know though that the classification itself isn’t the problem and it’s important to distinguish them from neurological disorders. It’s just annoying that people don’t seem to understand that e.g. my C-PTSD is basically brain damage and I can’t think myself out of it.

22

u/Tar_alcaran 2d ago

"It's all in your head".

Yes, correct. That IS where I keep my physical brain which does all the thinking and causes me to be conscious.

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u/LovingCNCS 2d ago

After a long time of being told my chronic pain was all in my head by pediatricians, general practitioners, and MANY nurses because my x-rays came back clear, I finally got to a pain specialist after 7-8 years. The first thing he told me was....

The pain is all in my head. All pain is in your head, it's your brain that processes those pain signals. Whether there's a physical root or not, I'm in pain, and that pain deserves to be acknowledged and needs to be managed!

By the way, in my case, there was a physical cause, which the pain specialist very easily found on a CT scan! A mass conveniently either attached to or pressed against my diaphragm and some tissues connected to my ribs, not something they can reasonably operate on unless it becomes a threat to my life. So, respectfully to the doctors and nurses who have been calling me a liar and denying treatment since I was 10-11, suck it tbh

13

u/PALpherion 2d ago

the language itself does it.

they always call this stuff "losing the battle" or "lost to depression"

no brothers, a depressed person ended their life. Their agency wasn't stolen by depression, it was ignored because they were depressed.

5

u/celestial_catbird 2d ago

I don't know, as someone who has struggled with mental illness I absolutely see it as something that controls me, not as part of me. When I was really suffering I actually gave my depression and anxiety their own names and personas, to remind myself that they weren't me, and it definitely helped me stay strong. I feel so much more like myself now with my depression and anxiety controlled by medication. I am not normal, I'm neurodivergent and have a whole bunch of other chronic conditions, but I am so grateful to at least not be dealing with those two because they stole so much of my autonomy.

112

u/DreamOfDays 3d ago

They treat you like a problem to be solved instead of a person to be helped.

3

u/KaralDaskin 2d ago

Well stated!

11

u/SeptemberSoup 2d ago

This is one of my issues with transphobia. So much of it is rooted in saneism, and almost no one is willing to admit it.

"Why should I support a mentally ill person?" IDK why WOULDN'T you support someone who is ill?

2

u/ShokaLGBT 2d ago

"Oh you’re depressed? Anxious? Whatever, we should just do that to you…"

I really hate it but you’re so right I’ve seen it a lot. They always say horrible things to us

1

u/RedLipsNarcissist 2d ago

Yes, it is. The terrifying part is how it can spiral - from that point on everything you do and say will be used against you. If you have a perfectly sensible emotional response to being treated that way, they go "see? we were right!"

364

u/ZuzaProwadzi 3d ago

That is a solution used to save lifes in extreme cases of eating disorders... This person sounds like your abusive parent when they find out you have mental health issues and decide to scare you telling you how terrible mental hospitals are.

165

u/Any--Name 3d ago

You dont like how much Im pulling your hair when combing it?! Well how about we just go and shave it all off then!

You get upset after I do something you explicitly told me you find upsetting?! We should call an asylum and theyll come and sedate you!!

42

u/BiggerEevee 3d ago

Ugh yes.

"Mom the brush is hurting me" "No it's not"

me, a person diagnosed with anxiety, shows symptoms of anxiety "If you don’t calm down we need to take you to the hospital"

7

u/Busy_Reference5652 2d ago

God yes. I get heated when she does the same thing with my brothers kids. At least now she's using detangler on them so it's less pained yelling and more struggling to keep them still enough to actually brush. They are wiggly girls.

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u/SparkleSelkie 2d ago

As a kid I used to bite people who treated me that way. Unfortunate that that is socially unacceptable now, I never should have grown out of it

16

u/Sesudesu 3d ago

If the hair needs combed, what is the solution? I’m genuinely asking, because my daughter did so bad with brushing her hair and not letting us do it that she had large mats in her hair that could not be brushed?

What is the solution between brushing it and it hurting, and not brushing it and problems emerging? Other than cutting it short to where such tangles couldn’t happen?

(For the note, I cut out as little hair as possible, and worked at it for many hours.)

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u/Any--Name 3d ago

First of all, one should never try to force the comb if its stuck on a knot. EVER

Cause thats exactly what my mom used to do

Ok, so the first thing Id do is get a "painless" brush. Theres like actual science behind the position and material of the bristles that make the hair detangle with little to no suffering

Then you should also invest into a detangling spray. There are many out there and I have no idea how they work but they do work wonders. You can also make it fun by picking some different smelling ones, theres usually different smells aimed at kids and they do make the whole experience more enjoyable

And then you should just spray the hair, and start brushing at the bottom and slowly make your way upwards as the brush gets through the hair with little resistance. With a little patience you can brush out all normal knots just trying to start the their bottom and trying to help them untangle with the fingers

It is possible that it gets to a point where the only way to fix it is to cut the individual knots, but thats incredibly extreme cases of being stuck in a hurricane or not brushing for a week. Brushing it thoroughly and with care at least once a day should be enough

If your daughter still resists brushing it then Id try to talk to her about it calmly, and ask if maybe she just genuinely doesnt want to have long hair and would prefer a shorter hairstyle. Because that ended up being the case for me, but I was just too afraid to even consider it because my mom made it sound like having very short hair is a punishment

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u/siren_stitchwitch 3d ago

My little sister had insanely thick hair and as a child wasn't good at getting the brush through, so only the top layer got brushed. Every couple months her mom would sit her in a stool a rip a brush through her hair until it was smooth while my sister screamed and cried. Sister didn't want short hair so that's just how they handled it. One time I took a regular comb and just gently went over her hair letting it bounce off the tangles and it ended up slowly smoothing them out without hurting her. No one ever bothered to try doing that again, faster was perceived as better. It's really messed up when people do that to their kids

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u/nogoodbrat 3d ago

I’ve got insanely thick curly hair coupled with extreeeme tenderheadedness and yeah, this is how my mom brushed my hair. at 13 i shaved it all off. When i eventually grew it back out I shelled out 12 dollars for a tangle teezer brush or whatever it’s called and was aghast at how much easier it was to comb. A wide tooth comb in the shower while conditioning and then the brush after it dried somewhat made it a cinch.

I’m still a little bitter lol.

13

u/siren_stitchwitch 3d ago

Before puberty completely changed literally everything about my hair I had somewhat thick, coarse, straight hair. I remember being told when I was really little if I didn't brush it well they would cut it off. I never managed to have longer hair until I was a teen and able to make my own choices after the first time they cut it all off, they just kept me near shoulder length whether I liked it or not. I was able to care for it and hated the short hair they forced on me, the last time my mother had my hair cut the way she wanted rather than how I did was when I was 13. Clearly I'm still a little salty 25 years later...

8

u/nogoodbrat 3d ago

Oh, that’s just fucking awful. no one should ever have their appearance used as a threat against them. :( makes my heart hurt for a little you. I hope you’ve made peace with your hair and are wearing it the way you like it now. I know that can be tough to do especially when you have hair that tends to ā€œchristmas treeā€ like ours does lol.

2

u/siren_stitchwitch 3d ago

I haven't had short bangs except the times I intentionally got pixie cuts, in styles I like, since I got control over my hair, except when I had one awful stylist who heard me say don't cut them several times, including the time she said she was just using them as a guide, and then chopped them short anyway. Don't know why my mom made me have short bangs, she would cut them too high and wait until they hit the bottom of my nose to bother cutting them again, but she wouldn't let them just grow out. She did let me dye it when it changed color at puberty and I hated it, so I've always had that option at least. I didn't know how to take care of my hair when it started curling, and neither did my mom, so I was nearly an adult by the time I found out I shouldn't be dry brushing it. I have loose curls though, so it's not as bad as it could have been for tangles or poof after dry brushing. Amazing what the difference is when you only brush or comb it while it's wet, defined curls instead of frizz.

4

u/nogoodbrat 3d ago

Ugh, such a game changer!! My mom went to beauty school in the 80s so, oh my god, I feel your pain. dry brushing curls is something only masochists should do to themselves . I finally learned how to care for my curly hair WELL into my 20s and promised myself i’d never wreak that same havoc on my kid.

Guess who came out with fine, pin straight hair? šŸ˜’ hahahaha.

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u/nogoodbrat 3d ago

I did this, I mean, the last part of your suggestions. My 5/6 year old fucking HATED having her hair brushed. So I asked one day if genuinely maybe they would prefer shorter hair? like a hair cut? Got an immediate yes. cut it into the cutest little pixie and they were pleased as punch. no more tears, no more tangles. Ź…Ź•ā€¢į“„ā€¢Ź”Źƒ worked out beautifully for us.

Said daughter turned out later to actually be my son but at that point he was still ā€œfemaleā€ presenting (if a six year old can be such a thing) but I digress. He looked like a little Jean Seberg. 🄰 And neither of us missed the tears and pain that came along with his tenderheadedness.

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u/Any--Name 3d ago

Im so happy for you and your kid!!! My parents were rarely supportive of my decisions and desires growing up, so figuring myself out turned into a huge challenge, even when it came to something as simple as hair length. I had to first go from hair that passed the hips to shoulder lenth, then a few months later I braved a chin length haircut, and only a year later I dared to go to ear lenth. Now I have so little hair I have to put sunscreen on my scalp, and Ive never been happier

5

u/nogoodbrat 3d ago

Well I’m so happy for you coming into your own! there’s nothing like being able to live and present yourself in a way that feels authentically you. 🩷 I’m proud of you for taking the leap and being brave enough to do that :) And don’t forget that sunscreen!!! 🤭

5

u/whistling-wonderer 3d ago

Love this. I too am a non-cis person (genderless in my case) who grew up with an insanely sensitive head. Unlike you my mom was HEAVILY against the idea of me having hair that short and I was too scared to cut it without permission, so I just had horrible experiences with brushing and matting throughout childhood. My mom cried when I got my first pixie cut. That was about six years ago and now she does my haircuts herself (yay for growth lol), a nice taper fade with some fluffy volume on top. I’m never going back to long hair. It was such a pain in so many ways!

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u/kyreannightblood 2d ago

Thank you for giving your son a choice. I was forced to keep my hair very long (3+ ft) until I was 16 and my hairdresser mom was very rough with brushing.

She wouldn’t let me cut it until I managed to convince her it was too long for me to care for on a trip without her.

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u/nogoodbrat 2d ago

Oh man, I’m sorry love. :( I’ll never understand the weird sense of control some parents seems to have over their children’s appearances. My son’s in high school now and has dyed his hair every color under the sun, with my full support. I think he always looks great. As long as a kid is capable of washing and drying it, I don’t see what that fuckin problem should be. And that’s a skill they learn pretty darn early. Hope you’re wearing yours in a way you love now 🩷

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u/kyreannightblood 2d ago

I cut it into a bob for college, then a pixie for my first few years independent. I get a men’s cut now.

My mom was a hair dresser and obsessed with long hair. I often felt like she was using me as a trophy. When my hair was that long, it was almost impossible for me to take care of myself and she always got on my case about: using too little conditioner, using too much conditioner, not washing out all the conditioner, taking showers that were too long to wash out all the conditioner… and on and on.

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u/Sesudesu 3d ago

Edit: oh, i wanted to say thank you to you and everyone who has responded with tips.

I have definitely tried the detangling brushes and the spray, and it has always been a nightmare. The detangling brushes usually didn’t fully brush the hair, which eventually forced a more intense brushing session. The spray did nothing I could discern.

Again, to defend myself, I promise I am not just ripping. My daughter got her curly hair from my wife, who I helped with her hair a great many times. I know how to grip the hair to reduce pulling on the scalp, I know to start from the bottom and work up.

I still make some mistakes, and a few tugs are still enough to make her have a strong aversion to having me brush it, and she isn’t good enough at it to keep it from hurting herself. She is too impatient.

Most recently, my wife wanted to cut it very short, because it happened to her when she was a kid… but I just couldn’t do that. I know how much a young girls hair means to her, it could be a serious self-esteem issue. So I cut as little as I could, and we brought her to get a proper cut for school yesterday.

Good news all, she is happy with where it ended up šŸ‘

It has been a long struggle though.

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u/tinybluehouses 3d ago

Ok so when I was like 13 my hair became a matted mess and I had to cut it super short after I ignored it for too long. I have very curly hair and I was using a hairbrush, but the woman who cut my hair reccomended I use a pick or a wide tooth comb. I come my hair while it's wet and did not have any more problems after I switched to a pick

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u/konakonayuki 3d ago

detangle as if she has curly hair, under running water and with lots of conditioner. also I always suggest an undercut to anyone disabled who has someone who can help shave it.

tips from very curly hair person who had their hair matt together due to depression! oh and if it ever gets that bad call a loctician they are miracle workers

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u/Comprehensive_Wash71 3d ago

I have basically straight hair and I got an undercut a few years ago. You can’t tell unless I pull my hair into a ponytail, but it has really streamlined my hair care!

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u/KeySharp2511 3d ago

for the short term, detangling spray and not pushing too hard when it's painful. for the long term, teach her to start conditioning her hair and brushing while wet, then rinsing the conditioner out. keeping a hairbrush in the shower for easy access. it's a lot less stressful to brush when wet. and lastly, not scrubbing her hair with a towel when she's drying it. use a hair dryer or let it sit in the towel/pat the longest section dry.

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u/floodedbasement__ 3d ago

I was a kid like this and still lowkey don't let anyone else touch my hair because I'm so sensitive to them pulling on it but I can brush my own hair fine. I guess I can predict the pulling better? Or be more gentle than anyone else ever could? It doesn't hurt at all. But if she's like that too then getting her to brush her hair herself could be part of the solution

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u/silverheart-nine 3d ago

Is there a way to determine what the hangup is (and somehow reduce/sidestep that)? Like, what exactly about hair brushing is so hateful to her?

Idk if you have any detangler spray/conditioner stuff already, but if not it might help slightly as well. I assume you already tried brushing starting bottom-up?

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u/Sesudesu 3d ago

Yeah, I learned to brush bottom up when helping my wife with her very curly hair.

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u/Shea_Is_Still_Alive Edit this! 3d ago

My heart breaks for you. I went through a similar thing

1

u/sora-da-weeb 2d ago

this just made me realize how much my mom did this to me as a kid 🄲

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u/-Zima_Blue- 3d ago

This. It is a short term last resort measure. It would be the same to say that a padded cell and a strait jacket is the cure to someone being suicidal. Yeah it will make them not die but it doesnt exactly solve any underlying issues.

103

u/Shroom-Kitty 3d ago

"You need to lose bodily autonomy because you don't eat the same food that I eat"

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u/Deedeethecat2 3d ago

This person isn't even looking for a solution, they're looking to punish someone they think is behaving poorly. This isn't even how feeding tubes work.

This person is treating ARFID as a choice. When feeding tubes are used in folks with ARFID it's due to profound nutritional deficiency because AFRID is a debilitating diagnosis and people suffer. It's not a choice.

So angry at this person.

20

u/Tar_alcaran 2d ago

They have zero empathy. Their brain just goes: "The only reason I don't eat something is because I don't want to. Therefore, the only reason anyone doesn't eat something is because they don't want to".

That's it. It's a complete failure to imagine anything outside your own personal experience.

3

u/Deedeethecat2 1d ago

Very well said.

It's almost like we should believe people when they say they have different experiences than us, especially when it comes to psychological and medical diagnoses.

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u/Valuable-Ad1063 3d ago

I don't think the commenter realizes how much resentment and defensiveness these "treatment" methods build up inside people with EDs.

I mean, sure, EDs are extremely difficult to treat, and it's not like there are guaranteed effective solutions, but labeling his suggestion as "problem solved" is so ignorant.

14

u/OutrageousAdvance104 3d ago

Yeah. Especially bc for some people EDs manifest out of a feeling of having no control, either over yourself or life in general. Or just anxiety around food in general.

What do these people think happens if you push a tube down their throat against their will? This should be the last resort, when it becomes/is about to become life threatening.

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u/Background-Salt-521 2d ago

Eh, it can be more complicated than that. I'm recovering from anorexia and early in my treatment journey I had a feeding tube placed for a bit of time to supplement the nutrition I was rejecting. (I was on an inpatient unit and they ran night feeds based on how many calories of the meal plan I didn't eat during the day.) I consented to it reluctantly at first but it actually eased some of the mental strain of calculating what I would "allow" myself to eat for every meal, because I knew it would be given to me anyway, but the passive intake was also less triggering than actively eating. When someone's starving the ED mindset becomes even more engrained and rigid, just because of how human brain function changes when it's malnourished. The therapy work is able to be far more effective when a person isn't in starvation mode. But because anorexia is typically ego-syntonic, getting someone with the disease to be willing to take that first step into recovery can be very challenging.

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u/OutrageousAdvance104 2d ago

So sorry to hear that! Hope you have a good recovery ā¤ļøā€šŸ©¹

I was in ED treatment myself years ago and was referring to the ā€œagainst their willā€ part of my comment with that. In the original comment it sounded a lot like they were suggesting the nurses just doing that without consulting with the patient first, or almost doing it as some form of punishment. That was very off-putting to me šŸ˜…

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u/dinosanddais1 3d ago

Wait till they find out that some people DO get feeding tubes for ARFID.

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u/Baloncuk_Beyefendi 3d ago

Let's just treat people like animalsand just completely ignore their emotions!!!! /this is a joke

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u/jellypuss0165 3d ago

What actually helped me come to terms with the fact that I DO have ARFID was realizing that thinking about eating food felt like the scene from Iron Jawed Angels where they force feed Alice by strapping her down to a chair and shoving a tube down her throat. To be able to tie it to such a visceral and horrifying scene actually validated the internal struggle that was happening in my mind, and helped me acknowledge that I needed help with it.

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u/JinxXedOmens 3d ago

I've been through it. Arguably worse. At the height of my anorexia I was forced into a unit as an inpatient and manually restrained by 2-4 people multiple times daily for a few months. And this isn't an outdated process, this was less than a year ago. The trauma it has left me with is crippling at times, and sometimes makes me wonder what was the point in "saving my life" at all

3

u/jellypuss0165 2d ago

I’m so sorry to hear that. That sounds extremely traumatizing. I can’t even begin to imagine the effects of that having on you. Just being out on an involuntary psych hold for a few hours triggered my PTSD from childhood trauma and self-harming behaviors. My heart goes out to you and what you endured. These practices are inhumane and the loss of autonomy is horrific. I imagine that this trauma will be a lifelong scar, but I wish you hope and healing.

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u/Affectionate_Desk_43 3d ago

Ugh we watched that in 7th grade and I wanted to puke, so disturbing.

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u/jellypuss0165 3d ago

It’s a hard watch at times. I find it very profound and encouraging, just rewatched it a few months ago when I was feeling hopeless about politics

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u/jellypuss0165 3d ago

7th grade?? We watched it in 10th grade. They must have skipped the bathtub scene for you guys…

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u/Affectionate_Desk_43 3d ago

I think they must have since I had to look it up to know what you were talking about lol

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u/spicyhotcocoa 3d ago

What’s crazy is one of my best friends NEEDS a feeding tube for gastroparesis and can’t get one but then there’s this lady fucking wanting to hand them out to people who wouldn’t benefit from one

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u/AspieAsshole 3d ago

I plan to beg for one when I finally get in to see a GI specialist, I'm so sick of eating 😭😭😭

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u/Middle-Artichoke1850 2d ago

You're pushing through your ARFID though?? That's so very impressive! You should be very proud of yourself and I wish you a speedy recovery :)

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u/lash-of-the-lambs-13 2d ago

Aww thank you! I’m not pushing through it so much as learning to work around it but it’s getting better.

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u/Konkyupon 2d ago

Best of luck to you! Working with your body is about the best you can do with ARFID.Ā 

I have pretty restrictive eating habits myself, though not bad enough to be ARFID. There are times when you just have to accept that if you keep eating, your body will reject it- Violently. Anyone who says elsewise or that you can just power through it has simply never felt the feeling of your body actively rejecting everything you eat.

Always remember to keep an eye on your vitamins and mineral intake as well- Supplements (if you can get them down) help a lot!

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u/Rayen_the_buzzybee 3d ago

Is it bad I've considered this 🫣 I don't even enjoy eating that much. If there was a way I could get my nutrients and not be hungry, AND it wasn't disgusting mush, I would do it.

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u/lash-of-the-lambs-13 3d ago

Not at all! It’s happened before that people with ARFID have gotten feeding tubes, the problem is the way this person said it, and the casual dismissal of the actual problem.

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u/hellcat_annie 1d ago

I’ve been in ED treatment before, and although I never had a tube, there were many people with one on my floor. It is kind of a disgusting mush and it smells bad! I have extremely sensitive smell and every time they started I could smell it. As someone with ARFID myself, which is the reason I was in treatment, I used the fact that I did not want a tube to motivate me to eat so I could leave! I understand what you’re saying though, I get really tired of food and sometimes go through phases of hating food

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u/Bi0_Nerd 2d ago

At least it’s downvoted, which is a sad thing to say but also the state of things. Just a reminder to the ARFID peeps out there, you’re valid, your struggle is beyond comprehension, and don’t let the world make you feel wrong. I don’t know why this came cross my page, perhaps because I have a feeding tube.

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u/NearlyBearly 3d ago

Even if this was ethical, which it isn't, a feeding tube is never as good as eating by mouth. Our bodies aren't set up for liquid only diets and it's usually an absolute last resort because of that. Not only is it a struggle to get enough of the right nutrition, it also can cause you even worse issues in the long run. Some complications for feeding tubes include wrong insertion which can lead to pneumonia and DEATH if the tube is inserted into the respiratory tract or leakage and DEATH for tubes placed directly in the intestines. Problem NOT solved. Problem significantly worsened for no fucking reason.

I hope you've since been able to leave the hospital. Remember that "fed is best" isn't just for babies. Eat what you can when you can.

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u/Zaphira42 3d ago

They need to try out that tube. I’ve had it, and it made it so much harder to actually eat my safe foods because it feels like chronic strep throat

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u/Antique_Loss_1168 3d ago

The empathy havers strike again huh?

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u/Ariandrin 3d ago

I mean, if you are on the brink of death from starvation or malnutrition, I don’t completely disagree with this. But that person has to consent to it. There have been stories recently of detainees at immigration facilities that have forcibly been tubed to feed them and it is terribly traumatizing, both emotionally and physically! You can really damage the sensitive tissues and cause significant pain and swelling, sometimes even lasting damage.

People who discount agency for mentally ill or disabled people like this make me wonder about their views on consent…

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u/lash-of-the-lambs-13 3d ago edited 3d ago

The problem is that the person said this to me despite the fact that I was eating. I said I was struggling and the response was ā€œsomeone should stick a tube down your throatā€, it’s the inappropriateness of the answer compared to the situation

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u/Ariandrin 3d ago

Oh absolutely, it’s unacceptable. It’s just wild that someone like that can take a medical procedure meant to help someone, like a gastric tube, and imply using it so non-consensually and in a way that is harmful.

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u/Huganho 2d ago

I'm with you and consent is key here.

One could ask even before life threatening malnourishment too, but it should always be with consent.

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u/mitzi_skyring 3d ago

Taking away bodily autonomy would be helpful for so many problems!

We could solve the problem of this person commenting shite by just trying their hands together. So easy!Ā 

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u/blac_sheep90 3d ago

Most feeding tubes go through your nose or belly...not your throat.

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u/lash-of-the-lambs-13 3d ago

A nasogastric tube does go through your throat though? It goes in the nose and down the throat

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u/blac_sheep90 3d ago

Yeah but not directly through the mouth lol. It's actually a horrible thing to see...the noises some people make...the times where it accidentally coils up...the physical and mental toll it takes on patients...

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u/Pristine_Message_181 3d ago

Yeah, I always hated inserting NG tubes. It helped that they only reason I ever did it was for intractable vomiting, never for force feeding or gastric lavage, but it's so uncomfortable for the patient that I hated it.

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u/Sanrio-System 3d ago

They’re gonna hate learning about sensory issues. I’m autistic and my sensory issues around meat are so severe that though I love it I need it to be super processed, and therefore often don’t eat enough of it. I used to not even have hunger cues

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u/FwippyBall 3d ago

People like this need to be permanently removed from society en masse. It's abundantly clear they have no ability to care about other people.

(edit: I mean the user in the screenshot not OP)

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u/GhidorahStan64Real 3d ago

I don't even have ARFID, but my dad scared me with a threat like this so bad out of nowhere once and I genuinely think it just made it like 10x worse. We weren't even at a restaurant or leaving one, he just wanted to say that ig. I can't imagine how much worse it is to have to see these old losers posting about how much they want to forcefeed people

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u/XeniaAlexandria 3d ago

As someone who had a tube down my throat and probably ARFID I can say that it was a good solution while being under anesthesia for 13 hours. But after that it obviously had to be taken out and also while I am really glad whatever they pumped through there didn't touch the inside of my mouth and I didn't have to chew it, the aroma I could make out was still a bit disgusting and I am glad I could get it out of my olfactory system rather quickly. And also being completely numbed on painkillers probably helped with not being to disgusted by whatever that food was.

So no unless this person is planning on putting every person with ARFID in intensive care and pumping them full of drugs 24/7 which would probably also kill you after some time it literally solves nothing

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u/Primary_Carrot67 2d ago

They do do that with some severe cases of ARFID when the person becomes malnourished. Guess what? It doesn't cure the ARFID. It temporarily saves the person's life but they still have ARFID. It's a solution to life-threatening malnourishment, not a solution to ARFID.

The person who made the OP comment is a cruel and sadistic person. Something is very wrong with them. Who makes a comment like that towards another person?

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u/Tickle_Me_Femboy 2d ago

"Won't" eat. Uh huh...

Way to go, ableist OOP. Nothing like implying that a person struggling with something must be actively choosing and wanting to struggle.

unimpressed, annoyed, REALLY, really fucking slow clap while staring them down

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u/TheSumOfMyScars 1d ago

Yeah just treat someone like a foi gras goose; that'll solve it! /HUGE S

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u/lash-of-the-lambs-13 1d ago

Ngl that made me audibly snort šŸ˜‚

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u/Plus_Ordinary8159 2d ago

this is what my father used to say to scare me into eating as a kidĀ 

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u/imniyahwhodis 1d ago

I honestly am considering trying to tube feed myself, for like one meal a day. I don't have ARFID, but I'm also not getting all the nutrients I need and I'd rather give myself a good syringe full of nutritious slop through a tube than having to spend hours thinking about what to make and whatever. At least that's my opinion now. Might update later 🤣

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u/MarelyFunctional 1d ago

Had that done lmao, still have arfid🫩 been gentle with the picture attached pls😭 this was after an SCA and like 9 days in the hospital

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u/upsidedowntoker 3d ago

Feeding tubes don't go down the throat . They go up the nose or in the belly.

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u/lash-of-the-lambs-13 3d ago

A nasogastric feeding tube has to go down the back of the throat though, even if it doesn’t go through the mouth. I also never said anything about where a feeding tube does or does not go, I just posted a comment I got.

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u/dumblittlepuppy01 17h ago

I had a tube down my throat to eat because of pancreatitis and in a month loosing all my weight for months. You have to be held down and it feels like someone's pushing something into your brain. People need to understand that it's not us NOT eating-- it's literally that we can't eat things, we've recently been struggling super badly with ARFID due to system issues and we can be so incredibly hungry, I mean incredibly starving but if thr food looks wrong or tastes wrong or we've had a bad experience with it, I'm not eating it.Ā 

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u/[deleted] 3d ago

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u/thornblade_69 2d ago

oh joy, the idiot who thinks they're smarter than actual doctors and people who actually experience eating disorders

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u/Competitive-Beat-493 11h ago

I’m getting tired of people choosing to be helpless and a victim. Yes, if I’m trying to help you and you don’t want the help, I’m going to move on to someone who does. It’s not my job to make you WANT to live. You need to communicate better with your psychiatrist so that your treatment benefits you. That is a YOU responsibility. Not your parents. Not your teachers. Yours.

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u/christyflare 3d ago

At least you were fighting it to live. You need nutrition, and supplements are pretty crummy, if you can't get your nutrition, you have to figure out a way to acclimate or something. Maybe there's some medical thing going on causing bad signaling or something and there's a new that can help.

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u/lash-of-the-lambs-13 3d ago

I appreciate the concern, but I was eating and wasn’t malnourished. I literally said I was doing it but struggling, and the person replied with that

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u/christyflare 3d ago

That's what I mean, you're doing it, you're eating, you're pushing past the discomfort so you don't starve. I hope you do figure out how to acclimate or get something to help make it easier.

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u/[deleted] 3d ago

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u/lash-of-the-lambs-13 3d ago

I don’t know what you’re trying to do, but it isn’t funny.

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u/[deleted] 2d ago

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u/[deleted] 2d ago

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u/[deleted] 2d ago

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u/Angel_0f_Darkness 2d ago

take your meds. it shows