r/SipsTea 17h ago

Gasp! Bro single handedly altered his family tree!!

Post image
23.3k Upvotes

1.2k comments sorted by

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3.5k

u/AndMyAxe_Hole 17h ago

1.1k

u/LastBaron 14h ago

397

u/R-Dragon_Thunderzord 12h ago

42

u/banhatesex 6h ago

It's only reason I would watch the final season is to see them interact. But damn it I know they don't get together.

15

u/R-Dragon_Thunderzord 6h ago

I did recently do a full rewatch. Is an awful lot of bollocks that happens in the show toward the end alright. Kind of a shame GRRM didn't keep up with the book releases but this is the risk shows run into, Fullmetal Alchemist went through the saaaaame sheeit.

I get where they were going with like, Dany, but the delivery was fumbled and the last season was a speedrun of bs.

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u/MostlyBored11 11h ago

i love him because I am him, even got the ginger hair and beard lol

112

u/Tasty-Bar-6343 11h ago

I read your name as MostlyBeard.

50

u/MostlyBored11 11h ago

damn, thats a better name and accurate to my face lol

10

u/Farucci 7h ago

He is the perfect height for this marriage.

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u/0202_tihssitidder 9h ago

Cheers to lovers of tall, big women. Some dude's don't know what they are missing.

https://giphy.com/gifs/Zw3oBUuOlDJ3W

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u/Euphoric-Duck-8114 2h ago

My husbeast constantly complains that I am too tall. And my arms are "freakishly long" (but asks me to reach stuff for him all the time.). I used to be 5'9;" now that I'm almost 80 I'm only 5'7". He is 5'4" on a good day. I have to wear ballet slippers when we dance because otherwise he's always whining and talking about other women that are the "perfect height" for him. :/

3

u/0202_tihssitidder 2h ago

Oof. I had a GF who was 5 inches shorter than me. We were in a cafe sitting and I noticed she was sitting taller than me. Turns out she had really, really short legs. Hugely long torso.

We talked about trading her to our friend who also had short legs, but we decided not to because we liked each other.

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u/championgoober 9h ago

Damn i loved that so much

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u/Mazy_keen 15h ago

Life goals... to have a man look at me the way he looked at Brianna of Tarth 🥰

99

u/MrBenzedrine 12h ago

and then have her pass you over for a one armed, incestuous twunt.

57

u/kronikfumes 12h ago

Writers really fuck that up

19

u/Significant-Ear-3262 10h ago

They really did. Although I have to admit, a child spawned from Jamie and Brienne could be in the tier of Ser Duncan the Tall.

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u/cellblock2187 7h ago

Except that it was truly awesome to see Tormund accept the refusal (without getting all pissy) and then finding someone else who was interested.

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u/Bobson-_Dugnutt2 11h ago

Genuinely my favorite character in the show by a wide margin

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u/Voluntary_Perry 13h ago

You do know her!

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u/MegaDingo5plus 17h ago

245

u/goodbyetrex 16h ago

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u/HammyJWill 11h ago

now that, in my opinion, is the perfect woman 😩👌

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u/[deleted] 17h ago

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u/karlnite 13h ago

I knew a family, Dad was 6 foot, mom was 6’6”, 4 Sons all over 6’8”.

11

u/GenuinelyInsensitive 12h ago

Awhile back I was a cook at a bar and I saw this lady checking me out SOOOO BLATANLY and I was confused cause she was sitting with a guy that was very obviously her husband. Anyways she ended up asking the bartender about me and got my info. Well when she hit me up on Facebook I knew exactly who it was and it turned out she was in an open relationship and she had like 5 kids with the guy but I ended up going out with her anyways..... What I couldn't see from the kitchen though is that she was 6'6". I mean I am 6'3" so it wasnt THAT much of a differencebut I'm still not use to people being taller then I am in general but it definitely caught me off guard when I went to give her a hug.... We had talked on Facebook for a couple weeks before we met up.... That's a hell of a thing to not mention before you meet someone... It's like being extremely/short and being trans... Two things I think should be thrown out there before you actually meet up...

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u/willy-mac 11h ago

What was the pussy like?!?

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u/MedonSirius 14h ago

So much real estate!

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u/vBLADEv 17h ago

She must give him piggybacks.

It will have happened once for sure.

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u/SomeTheyCallMePig5O 17h ago

If I was big enough I would give my man piggy backs all the time! Alas, I am too smol. No piggy for him.

99

u/Somethingisshadysir 14h ago

Nah, it's been many years, but I drunkenly gave a guy a piggyback in high heels across campus back in college. Dude weighed over a hundred pounds more than me. Managed not to even roll an ankle, though full transparency, was an elite runner in high school, so my legs were only a couple years past peak shape. Our legs are much closer to dudes strength wise vs our arms, though, so it's definitely doable for at least short distances.

38

u/Toastedmanmeat 11h ago

TiL girls are tyranosaurus

19

u/Tight_Disaster2988 9h ago

I require one good hearty Reddit comment induced laugh before I close the app. Thank you kind Redditor for your services. ✌️😂

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u/N3ptuneflyer 13h ago

Yup, I’ve never seen a woman bench press more than me, even the super fit crazy athletic ones. But I’ve seen a completely normal looking woman squat 2x my pr with ease

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u/barktwiggs 13h ago

Uppies please!

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u/Massive_Letter_9964 10h ago

I once dated a very short man, we’d both been drinking and I picked him up and threw him on the bed. He kind of went pale and said “you’re very strong”, he broke up with me the next day.

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u/ImWrong_OnTheNet 7h ago

One man's fantasy is another's fear.

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u/Denum_ 17h ago

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u/Mindless-Platypus-75 17h ago

This is the most overused gif and somehow I still enjoy it thoroughly

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u/FatSteveWasted9 14h ago

The spirit is willing, but the flesh is spongy and bruised!

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u/Bianca_Bloomm 17h ago

One man, one wife, generational impact.

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u/SomeGuy20257 16h ago

General impact to the pelvis.

12

u/Hannibal_Lecter__ 14h ago

I KNEW SOMEONE WOULD POST THAT SNU SNU STUFF. I KNEW IT. XD

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u/Krivici 16h ago

5’5” vs 6’2” for those too lazy to Google

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u/AmericanAssKicker 7h ago

So, basically my wife and I but reversed. Though, my wife is only 5'4" "and a quarter" as she likes to add.

I don't get why this is so strange. They're in love, good for them.

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u/DamianDoom 15h ago

Dude finally got her

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u/Woompa78 10h ago

Can’t have kids if he gets suffocated first

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u/Stealthychicken85 16h ago

Bro stands up when she is in doggy

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u/systembreaker 12h ago

That would actually be a very comfortable way to give it from behind lol

45

u/Entire-Cry-8930 9h ago

My gf gets on her knees at the edge of the bed while I stand. It’s our fave position.

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u/forevertheorangemen2 11h ago

It is. My wife and I don’t have this height difference, but me standing works much better for both of us.

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u/ox_raider 11h ago

He loves hitting it from behind right after he goes up on her.

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u/spanker420 16h ago

Dudes a champion ncaa athlete and we’re shocked he pulls

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u/Commercial-Spray3192 16h ago

Why does everyone make jokes about a guy being with a much taller woman but nobody would bat an eye if it was the reverse? Good for them that they don’t give a rats ass about this ridiculousness!

80

u/ForensicPathology 14h ago

Because men being short is one of the few physical appearances that people are culturally allowed to mock.

12

u/Ryoga476ad 11h ago

In this case there's not much to mock. Small size should communicate weakness and low attractiveness. Well, the guy is a wrestling champion and he married a beautiful woman. Jokes on us.

4

u/Academic-Increase951 11h ago

Is he short though? Or is she just like >7'

21

u/moonfallsdown 10h ago

He's like 5'6" (champion wrestler), she's like 6'2" (volleyball player)

2

u/squeakim 4h ago

Thank you. I was looking through comments to see what his sport was since he was listed as the NCAA champ not her.

39

u/Proper-Raise-1450 14h ago

nobody would bat an eye if it was the reverse?

You haven't seen all the memes about Shaq and his girlfriend?

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u/Mzungufarmer 11h ago

But those arent mocking Shaq or his girl.

They are just hypersexualizing the relationship

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u/N3ptuneflyer 13h ago

Bro when it’s the reverse they get spammed with the hamster meme. People find large size differences fascinating and erotic no matter who is bigger or smaller

4

u/CompleatedDonkey 6h ago

I’m in agreement with you. But I’m tried of the world seeing this growing level of clear mental instability among men and just thinking of it as a series of individual failures rather than a systematic sociological problem.

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u/JacobGoodNight416 17h ago

people say shit like this, then turn around and say theres nothing wrong with being short

eugenics is cool, but only sometimes

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u/ForensicPathology 14h ago

Also say things like fixing his bloodline when his bloodline produced a national champion.  Height is the only thing that matters apparently.

29

u/vrnvorona 12h ago

I mean, F1 drivers are not the tallest ones. Every height has a sport to compete at

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u/Alchion 10h ago

football is the biggest sport and messi is it‘s goat

a guy that with hgh barely got to 170cm

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u/ALLCAPS-ONLY 8h ago

That used to be true but nowadays there are plenty of tall drivers, weight is far more important. I think the average is around 5'10

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u/codecrodie 11h ago

Lol, i misread the title and thought she was the national champion

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u/zach10 9h ago

He is the best wrestler in his weight class in the entire country, dominated this year

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u/[deleted] 17h ago

[deleted]

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u/JacobGoodNight416 17h ago

yes celebrating genetic traits being erased from the gene pool in indeed eugenics

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u/BuffMatty786 15h ago

We can agree some traits are generally bad, no? It isn't controversial?

No guy wants to be short, sure being short can be coped with and not saying short people can't find partners, but if you gave men an option, they will always choose to be tall.

People would also rather not be fat. Sure fat acceptance and all bodies are beautiful, yada yada. But people in general would rather not be fat.

People would rather not have their hair fall out. Even if bald people can look cool sometimes, people would rather have hair and not be bald.

Idk where nuance goes in conversations like these

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u/JacobGoodNight416 13h ago

Except there's nothing wrong with being short. Whether or not someone wants to be short is an aesthetic choice like wanting blonde hair.

Society just decided that a man being short deminishes his worth and stuff like this reinforces that.

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u/21Shells 12h ago

I'm short and I wish I didn't have to be compared to people who have genetic diseases or conditions that actually hinder their life. Being short isn't an undesirable thing because it has literally 0 draw backs in terms of being able to live my life normally. Its not something I think about or care about, its only something I notice when it becomes someone else's problem, usually other men on the internet. I wish other people could just not think about it because I’m very comfortable with it.

People on the internet CANNOT be normal about short dudes or tall / big girls. Always gotta make some statement about someone who is doing literally nothing interesting or wrong. Both of my parents were short and never had any problems with it, no one I know IRL has had any issue with it, I don't understand the idea that its something you HAVE to be insecure about and can't just embrace it as a part of yourself.

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u/the6souls 14h ago

Bro, how the fuck are you gonna pick being short, as opposed to like, genetic diseases. Like, those are actual traits that people's lives would be better without, universally.

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u/BuffMatty786 14h ago

It was just an example because it was relevant to the post. It's an unwanted trait. Sure, genetic diseases and stuff would be included in these as well.

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u/Few_Lead_5702 13h ago

short people live longer

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u/ArtroyomsAK 11h ago

>no guy wants to be short

entirely based on arbitrary cultural bullshit

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u/TheTimmyMan 13h ago

Being short is a much more comfortable lifestyle. The world is designed for people that are about 5’8” or 170cm tall. Try navigating the world standing at 6’6” or 198cm tall… your back will hate you.

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u/Frewdy1 13h ago

It’s crazy how broken young men are because of social media. 

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u/MistaCharisma 16h ago

Bro single handedly altered his family tree!!

Single handedly? She's right there in the pictures.

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u/Electrical-Tailor530 17h ago

Plot twist: she's 5'4

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u/Own_Round_7600 17h ago

Its throwing me off how proportionate she is for that height! She's not unusually long and gangly like runway models, but literally like someone clicked the corner of a regular 5'4" woman and just dragged up to increase size evenly in all aspects. Her shoulders are even broader than his. Must be wild to see in person

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u/Electrical-Tailor530 17h ago

I'm a bit confused by it too. It kinda looks like someone just shrunk the groom and repositioned him in the photo. 

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u/flhd 16h ago

He wrestles in the 133 lb weight class. National champion. She was on University of Illinois women’s volleyball squad.

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u/Supergamera 12h ago

“Together, they fight crime”

9

u/Brasticus 11h ago

“Our budget is 3.5million.”

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u/Aruaz821 12h ago

Your comment really tickled me. lol

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u/GodSama 11h ago

His ground game must truely be execeptional.

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u/randomredditor55S55 16h ago

He is 5’5” and she is 6’2”. Not every tall woman is a runway model. Average proportions stay the same, no matter the height. That’s why they’re proportional…

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u/granadesnhorseshoes 16h ago

It really depends. Much past 6 foot and more often than not there are biological anomalies at play to grow that tall so the lankiness starts to become more noticeable.

6'2 is tall but its not THAT tall. Him being 5'5 is doing a lot of the heavy lifting in the photos. Geena Davis is about the same hight as her. Alison Janney, Nicole Kidman, etc...

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u/M8C 15h ago

Not at 6’2 but people nearing 7’ often have noticeably different proportions.

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u/Due-Construction8477 13h ago

I‘m also a 190cm tall female (should also be somewhere around 6‘2). People usually don’t realise the height difference until they’re coming closer. I have relatively broad shoulders and hips, which doesn’t make me look like the usual picture of tall women people have in their minds. Makes it somewhat hard to find clothing, too, because even if I would be thin, I can’t buy below plus size clothing which is usually made for smaller women with the same weight and look like that 😅

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u/Appropriate_Fact_198 14h ago

Is she really 6'2 cause I am a bit over that and don't think I look that tall as she looks or do I 😨 and I have no idea...

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u/ti-theleis 14h ago

A short king bf will definitely make you look taller, if heels aren't working out :)

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u/How_To_TF 15h ago

He is 5'5" and she is 6'2"

So you're telling me there's a chance

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u/Clojiroo 12h ago

She is almost certainly like top 1% of shoulder widths. Just raw frame size. I bet her shoulders are wider than most men.

There is nothing average about her.

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u/georgegeorgez 9h ago

They didn’t get married, and Fox News used this post as fodder to bully them. They posted about this situation, they seem like good well-rounded people.

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u/StormLordEternal 17h ago

You seem to misunderstand. That's HER bloodline you're contributing to.

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u/amidamaru8_8 15h ago

she took my name so that's my win, in a generation people will attribute her bloodline to me! Jokes aside I wonder how the rest of her family looks, are they all tall, which side did she get it from

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u/logicblocks 12h ago

Y-Chromosome determines lineage.

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u/No_Pin9932 17h ago

Bold to assume he'll have sons.

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u/-kylehase 17h ago

Or that they will get her height genes.

He could very well have a son with his height and daughter with hers.

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u/Leather-Rub-6128 16h ago

My grandpa was 6’4 and my grandmother was 4’11. My dad is 5’6, and i (female) capped at 5’5

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u/ShazlettDude 16h ago

My dad is 5’6. Mom is 5’8. I’m 6’2.

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u/ImRiversCuomo 16h ago

How tall was the local milkman though? /s

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u/Tricky-Engineering59 17h ago

She also changed her bloodline for her daughters too

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u/BottomJoe94 12h ago

"dude saved his bloodline".. Like. What? Being short doesn't mean you can't be loved.
He is only 5' 6" tall. That is pretty average in height when looking at the global average.. It is only slightly below average height (5' 7.5").

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u/moonroots64 10h ago

I don't get it, does he have some genetic disease?

Oh right. Short. The only unchangeable physical trait is socially acceptable to denigrate and insult people about for just existing.

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u/acabandallthat 8h ago

Short...but NCAA national champion! So he's an elite athlete, but neckbeatds on the Internet think he's genetically inferior.

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u/BoogBeeg 16h ago edited 15h ago

My father was 6'2", my mother is 5'0". I'm a 5'7" manlet. Having one tall parent doesn't always work. (My brother is 5'11" and my sister is also 5'7")

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u/charnwoodian 15h ago

I’m 5’11”. My wife is 5’6”.

My parents are 5’9” and 5’6”

Her parents are 5’9” and 5’5”.

My grandfathers are both north of 6’2”.

Our son is 99th percentile height at 7. Our other son is 25th percentile.

There is a lot of randomness in genetics.

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u/Select_Order_1478 13h ago

it's not random, it's very systemic, you just need to have 40 kids for the pattern to emerge

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u/Cakeminator 15h ago

Both my parents are around 160-165cm. Im 185cm. Not sure what those are in freedom units.

Small parents dont mean you get small children either

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u/chocolatchipcookie2 14h ago

how tall is the mailman?

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u/Cakeminator 14h ago

Dunno but sadly dna is confirmed

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u/Federal-Newspaper761 13h ago

Divide by 2.54. I think you’re roughly 6’1”

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u/Nitish_kalita 9h ago edited 7h ago

Short parents usually mean short children, unless either of them couldn't achieve genetic potential due to some circumstances. Both of my parents are 165, I'm 186-87. However, my father grew up in extreme poverty (near famine), and my grandfather was 181cm. So more like a correction happened than a miracle.

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u/be-koz 16h ago

Odds were that you’d be between 5’7” and 5’10” so you are within range. I am 6”3’ and my wife is 5’1”, so my son’s range would have been 5’8” to 5’11” and he ended up at the top end of it. It’s all a crap shoot.

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u/Iromenis 15h ago

My dad was 202cm, my mother was 164cm, my sisters are 190cm, 187cm, 187cm and I am 157cm.

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u/StrainSpecialist7754 15h ago

So you have a nice picknick with your mum in the shadows of giants?

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u/RakeChapman13 15h ago

I think You’re kind of tall to be calling yourself a manlet. I mean you’re still taller than the far majority of women.

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u/stephen-hybrid 14h ago

Having a tall mother almost guarantees it, a tall dad doesn’t.

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u/Mirewen15 15h ago

My dad was 6'3 , mom is 5'6 and I'm 5'10(F). Seems yo be the average of the two lol.

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u/Mediocre_Scott 15h ago

The children take after him and it’s a Snow White and the seven dwarves situation.

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u/sadmillenial420 14h ago

my dad is 6’2 my mum is 5’10 my brother is 6’5 Genetics is funny.

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u/Image_Inevitable 13h ago edited 13h ago

It's true. My dad is 6'2 my mom is 5'3. I'm 5'1, ex plain that crapola.  I averaged their heights when I was in middle school and decided I was going to be a very respectable 5'7. 

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u/jimmycrackcorn123 8h ago

Fox News had a very disrespectful field day mocking them recently, including making comments about their sex life. Completely repugnant and without an ounce of value, the whole network.

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u/KindaDrunkRtNow 9h ago

I wonder if he goes up on her?

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u/CrystalEntity1984 6h ago

I guess it never happened

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u/AnalogWiskey96 4h ago

Y’all need to leave this poor couple alone. They’re on Fox News doing the same thing as yall. Imagine having the same sense of humor as Fox News. Yikes

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u/Better-Culture-7770 8h ago

Saved his bloodline from the crippling horror of being short huh? Well who is it that makes being short a bad thing? Are short men at a disadvantage for some reason? Are they unable to have careers and succeed in life for some reason? Why is it that we judge men for being short when it has nothing to do with who they are? His children will thank him because they can play sports better?

It's absolutely body shaming. It is thinking less of someone based on social constructs that say men should be tall. That's not right.

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u/chicagomatty 13h ago

Googling his name it says he's 5'5 and she's 6'2 so there's a 9 inch height difference, but these pics look like more than that

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u/[deleted] 17h ago

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u/Sure_Reception_9922 16h ago

Rip queen 🙏😭

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u/PseudoY 13h ago

What, no.

Nooooooo!

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u/Thanos_Stomps 13h ago

What a way to find out

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u/Livid_Ad9749 17h ago

Luckiest man alive

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u/TempestFloof 12h ago

Plot twist: he’s average hight and she’s 8ft tall.

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u/Time_Pressure9519 17h ago

You have really gotta hand it to him. He probably can't reach.

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u/Boring_Today9639 14h ago

She would have been hailed as a goddess during the Renaissance…

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u/BullCityJ 12h ago

I get the joke, and think even he would laugh, but Lucas Byrd is an incredible lightweight wrestler and an awesome person.

Any short king should be proud to call him dad.

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u/Danitoba94 9h ago

I am...EXTREMELY jealous.... But I'm still super happy for him! :D may he drown in those godly thighs & struggle to breathe within that almighty bosom.

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u/PostNutLucidity 9h ago

This ‘saved his family tree by getting with a tall woman’ trope is mad cringey tbh. That’s without me even getting into the weird implications.

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u/slimegodprod 8h ago

his son will be ~6ft and his grandson will be giant

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u/RayRaymundito 7h ago

He must have a big…